As a Boy
by LiveLifeLikeNeverBefore
Summary: Isabella has changed completely, not just eternally."My name is Stingher Blesser, it means Lone Hurt- I hurt alone" I stated with a grin, my male voice cracking up as I gazed up at Edward, "And I'm gay" I know it's a lie but look at his face. "Excuse me?"
1. I'm fine

**_Edward left permentaly durring New Moon. Stingher Blesser is all that is left of Isabella Swan- Being that she is him. She had been turned by an unkown vampire and had the gift to change her appearence into one of a males. She has lived the image of a male image of herself for all of her vampire life, not even her oven knows she's secretely a girl. What happens when the Cullens come and have a weird feeling about Stingher Blesser. Just becuase she can, our hidden Bella decides to mess with the Cullens, who in return start relizing who Stingher really is.._ ~I know alot of people did a similar plot but it is a twist where The Cullens meet her- thinking she's a him and Bella's humor kicks in. Kakabell your in for a huge suprise! READ ON~**

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_If I were a boy~_

It has been a good century since Edward Cullen had left the raining town of Forks, left with his family, and left me to rot in hell. Hell, yes this is an appropriate term don't you think? A world without meaning.

I had let Charlie down and had gone into depression, it seemed all I did was on auto pilot. I listened, and remembered everything, ending up acing my whole senor year with an empty soul. I got a scholar ship from Harvard but ripped it up. Who cared about Harvard when there was no future for yourself?

I had lived two years as a different person, hiding everything from everyone. I hid under jackets, hats and the roof of Charlie's house, which I could never call home. When I started Senor year Charlie worked all day not wanting anything to do with me. I illegally changed my name behind his back and cut my hair to a shaggy mess, changed my wardrobe into one of a males. During that whole Senor year I was known as Stingher Blesser, known as the foreign student. In Romanian Stingher means _Lone_, while in French Blesser means _Hurt_. And throughout the whole year everyone knew me as a male.

I never got caught.

Then I had been bitten by God knows who.

And Now I here in front of the place I never wanted to be, ever. Forks High School, home of the Spartans.

If you are confused then let me help you. I used to be known as Isabella Marie Swan, now my name is Stingher Blesser. I was bitten by a vampire two years after another vampire left me with his family. I woke up alone and have been alone until I stumbled into a coven of vampires that agreed to my diet of animals. That was a good fifty years ago. Throughout my immortal life I had found my vampire gifts.

My first one being a mental shield, blocking all mind deceiving tricks or attacks.

My second being that I could change my appearance to that of a males.

Ever since I was turned I have used my second gift and everyone that had crossed my path, being human or vampire, never knew I was really a female. I was always a guy to them.

The Coven that took me in doesn't even know I'm a girl, I'm one of the guys.

If you are wondering who this Coven is it is the Maxwell family, consisting of a mother, Margarita Maxwell, twenty six, who was born in Russia sporting moist looking long butt length blond hair. Then there is a father, Damien Maxwell, thirty, born in Maine sporting short brown hair. Both are mates if you haven't guessed.

Then there is Alexander and Ceciel Maxwell, mates, who both have black hair, Ceciel's is shoulder length while Alexander's is in a loose ponytail. Both born in England, and yes they even sport the accent.

Lastly there was Victor and Kami Maxwell, mates, Victor born in Florida while Kami born in Australia. Victor had short dark red hair with a golden tent to it and Kami had shoulder length dark brown hair that curled at the end.

Then that left me, the one without a mate. As you all may already know I was born in Forks, Washington. I sport long curly mahogany hair and was turned when I was nineteen.

We were all vegetarians meaning we all had golden eyes.

"Move it, Blesser!" Alexander laughed shaking my shoulder to get into the front office with Ceciel tucked safely under his arm. Ceciel turned and winked at me, her own way of saying _"Excuse him, I know he's rude"._

I shook my head then turned it lazily to watch another one of my families couple walk up. Victor playfully nudged my shoulder and Kami quickly hugged my side before skipping over to Victor. I couldn't help but smile, they were a cute couple, reminded my of Jasper and Alice.

The hole in my chest expanded a bit, making me wince, but I was slowly getting used to it and I was slowly getting over the Cullen's, so I could say their names without having a heart attack- which was impossible might I add.

"Ready, honey?" My adopted vampire mother, Margarita, asked as she held my adopted fathers hand. I smiled and nodded. "Good Luck, don't let Alexander get to you" she giggled turning back to the family car. We all agreed to walk home, so we didn't need vehicles of our own. I watched them drive away and turned unwillingly to the school that I had gone to as a human.

"Disaster is waiting to happen" I said, my male voice sounding exhausted, and ran my hand through my shortly cut shaggy mahogany brown hair, taking a mental note that it kind of resembled Jaspers hair.

"Get your ass in here Blesser!" Alexander yelled as he pocked his head out from the office, waving what I presumed to be my schedule. "I swear you need a woman to keep you on earth!" he snorted but was whacked by his mate, Ceciel.

Yes, how strange that they want me to find a female mate when I myself am a female and am a straight one at that. I wasn't looking for a mate anyway, Edward left his mark and I won't let anyone else repair it.

"Wait until we play baseball, Alexander, I won't hold back when I get to pitch the stinking ball at your head!" I snorted walking up to him and snatched the schedule out of his hands. The Maxwell's were a baseball family like the Cullen's, and I was the proud pitcher. "And remember I never miss" I cackled evilly while turning on my heel and heading off to my first period class.

"You wouldn't dare" Alexander stated but I heard the laughs of the rest of the family in the background. "Come on guys, he wouldn't… would he?" I heard him grumble under his breath. At that the whole family busted out laughing. "Crap".

Forks High School hadn't changed at all in the last century, the building were small and huddled together and the population was at a low 321, now 326 students.

I entered my first period class a few seconds before the bell rung and the teacher looked up at me with a smile, "You must be Mr. Blesser, I'm Mr. Miff your History teacher- you can sit right back there next to Nashaly" I nodded lazily and went down the isle, sitting myself next to a energized Hispanic teenager that had deep expressive eyes.

"I'm Nashaly Kakabell! Head of Drama Class, so if you need a hook up to any parts in a play I'm your girl" wow, she said that all in one breath. What surprised me is that she wasn't hitting on me but sincerely being friendly.

"Pleasure, my name is Stingher Blesser" I stated raising my hand to her in a greeting. Humans didn't taint my hunger as much as a normal vampire, I tended to be polite to all of them remembering that once I was once a weak human.

"Blesser?" Nashaly asked raising a thin eyebrow as she shook my hand, "Do you bless people or something?" she asked again as she dropped her hand on her lap and subconsciously started rubbing it to regain its warmth I presume.

"Nah" I chuckled, "just a last name". I didn't take on my Coven's last name for my personal reasons.

"It's a cool last name, jejejeje" Nashaly laughed covering her mouth to try and muffle it when the teacher gave her a warning glance.

I cocked my eyebrow up at her unique laugh and let a grin break through my face- I like her already. Just to make it clear to you I'm not going around earth as a depressed love sick immortal- I know it is stupid to relive the past. I'm happy and content.

"I could say the same about you last name" I whispered grabbing my books out of my book bag and started copying down notes that weren't necessary but props. This made her bust out laughing and having the whole class stare at us. The teacher glared.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Miff, that was my fault- I told her a joke" I stated softly. He shook his head with a sigh and continued on with the lesson. I love this class already.

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**_Read and Review. Any advice or comments for future chapters will be greatly appreciated!_**


	2. Cafeteria amusement

**Hopefully the first chapter didn't throw you off, but I'm trying to get some good humor into this story, so if you have any gay hook lines, jokes, or serious gay actors that I could mention in the future chapters please put them on your review if you can! Love you Le-Le and Kakabel! READ ON~**

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It ironically turned out that my new found friend, Nashaly Kakabel, had every class with me. I swear if I was a true guy we would already be dating! We were currently chatting to one another about cross country, which Forks High School was now offering as a sport, walking to lunch.

"So if I signed up for cross country would you join me?" I asked raising an eyebrow at her. A grin broke through her face and I couldn't help but laugh. "Is that a yes?" I asked my male voice becoming a bit hoarse from using it so much in one day. I quickly cleared my throat.

"Well of course it is dork!" Nashaly snorted lacing her arm through mine and we both literally marched through the cafeteria doors but Nashaly paused right when we entered, "You said you were gay right?" she asked in a whisper.

That was my cover for not paying attention to the female population, though my Coven couldn't quite grasp the concept.

"Yes, does it make you uncomfortable?" I asked. We had talked it over a period back, and Nashaly didn't seem to feel repulsed by it, she seemed delighted that I was gay even.

"No, I just wanted to warn you not to hit on the Cullen boys, maybe Edward- I think he's gay, I was thinking that maybe you two should hook up, but then again he doesn't show his gayness in public so he could still be straight… I don't know but I wouldn't risk it" again she said all of this in one break. I would have asked her to slow down if it wasn't for the fact that she mentioned the Cullen's.. in this school.

Well crap. Just when I was getting over them they had to reappear. I scanned the cafeteria out of instinct and sure enough there they were, in the same spot they sat a century ago. They were talking in vampire voices while staring away from one another. Brilliant. And did she just say Edward and me, gay couple? Gosh, I change into a boy to avoid being paired up and now BAM! I just end up in an awkward situation.

"Hey you okay Mr. Blesser gay guy? Need to go to a church?" Nashaly asked raising an eyebrow.

"Nah, Just looking at pretty boy over there that you just mentioned- by my gay radar I do believe that in fact he is gay!" I laughed swinging an arm around her shoulder as she lead me over to her lunch table.

"Seriously?! JEJEJEJE!" Nashaly laughed and I faintly heard some of the Cullen's laugh at their table, they heard me I presume, but I faintly heard a growl in protest.

"Well didn't you see his posture? It totally spelled out G.A.Y!" I boomed out for the whole school to hear.

"Oh lordly!" Nashaly barked out in her little giggles and sat down near a girl with thick chestnut hair, that had these sparkly reading glasses with her nose rammed into a book. There was a blond beside her, filing her semi long nails. "Guys! This is Stingher Blesser, Mr. Blesser these are my strange friends, Leanne Black and Melissa Gaul" Nashaly called out while motioning for me to sit down next to her, which I did.

"Pleasure" I stated with a grin and I faintly saw them gawk at me before I quickly stated, "I'm your friendly, gay, homo, foreign exchange student". That slammed their mouths shut.

"That's nice" they both muttered diverting their eyes but then Leanne looked behind me and then looked me back in the face before asking, "You related to the Cullen's?".

"If Edward agrees to Mary me, but until then my answer has to be No" I chuckled throwing a glance at the Cullen table to see them trying to hold back laughter but Edward was shaking his head. The whole in my chest twitched but I stiffly ignored it and smiled back at my new human friends. "I'm adopted by the Maxwell Family over there" I cocked my head over to my family that was looking at me strangely- for sitting with humans I presume.

"oh.. You all look the same" Melissa murmured glancing between the three of us.

I smirked, remembering I had thought that the first day I had come to Forks as a human.

It hurt to have them so close to me, but at least they had not even the slightest clue who I am. Maybe I could mess with them until our families had to move again, which would be a good three or so years. It would be fun and interesting.

"So no that we know Edward Cullen is gay, what are you going to do?" Nashaly asked with a huge grin.

"Easy, I'm going to stalk his ass" I remarked mirroring her grin with my own, "actually I just want to leave it be, if things work out in my favor I'll have myself a boyfriend in no time at all" I stated lifting my chin up making them all laugh.

"Whatever you say, 'Mr. Blesser', you do that" Leanne scoffed glancing over at the Maxwell table then looked at me. "I think your family is mad at you, Stingher" she stated with a frown.

I let out a sigh before I turned my attention to my family who sat in the opposite direction as the Cullen's. They were staring at me in disappointment, a frown edged in their faces.

"What the hell are you doing?" Alexander hissed in the lowest tone as possible while glaring holes at me. "Get your stinking gay ass over here before you actually start telling them personal things about yourself!". I just stared at him in a bored manner making him growl in hatred. "Why can't you just listen for once?" he asked standing up and slamming his fist on the table, in a humanly strength of course.

"Nothing will slip" I stated with a shrug before turning back to Nashaly, Leanne and Melissa- who I guess were watching as Alexander punched the table. "No need to fret, Alexander has a anger issue" I assured them with an easy smile.

"Well at least we know that even drop dead gorgous people have their flaws.." Melissa murmured picking at her food.

"Oh, believe me every has their dark side" I chuckled throatly throwing a glance at Edward and quickly looking away before he could notice. "Which is why I am gay" I informed them with another smile.

"You mean you weren't born gay?" Leanne asked raising her eyebrows, "not to be rude or anything of course.. but I just assumed.."

"No, no, it's fine. I used to be as stragiht as a person can get" I said smoothly, slyly avoiding using any genders, "but you know this happens and that and walla, gay me at you service!" I laughed at the end to lighten up the mood and they all joined in.

"So what made uh- Alex was it?- so agressive just by staring at you?" Nashaly asked sending a glance at Alexander quickly looking away with a blush relizing he was still staring at our table. "he scares me" she added and I saw Alexander smile in approval.

"Don't he's a huge chicken" I said leaning back in my chair trying to ease my stiffness, "He has had an aggression problem ever since I can remember, I came into this family as the youngest so my memory is foggy" Yes I am the youngest despite me being nineteen, Alexander and Victor are both twenty-one while Ceceil and Kami are both twenty.

"What do you think caused it?" Melissa asked.

"Not enough attention" I muttered glancing at the Cullen table when I heard movement. Edward was getting up and was muttering things under his breath that I coldn't quite catch, and he made a B line to the exit, but me being me, and me being a vampire that sticks with her appearence as a gay guy, yell, "Nice ass you got there Cullen!".

Edward froze in his tracks as the whole cafeteria erupted in laughter- incuding my family and his.

"What, he has a nice butt doesn't he?" I asked innocently with a shrug of my shoulders. I heard murmurs of agreement from some tables and grinned in success. Though here comes Edward.

"I don't think we have properly introduced ourselves, have we?" Edward grounded out through his gritted teeth standing by me with his fists clenched and his black eyes raging. The whole in my chest tugged a bit more open but I ignored it with a grin.

"My apoligies" I stated standing up next to him. I was still the same height as a human so Edward was still a head taller than me, but who cares when you can bug the living- well dead- crap out of him? "My name is Stingher Blesser, and I'm gay" I introduced myself in my flirtiest man vioce I could muster up but it cracked a bit. I added really quietly under my breath so no one could hear, "wanna get hitched?"

"Excuse me?" Edward barked with no amusement on his face what so ever, just disgust.

"Oh, this is the part where you say, lovely to meet you my name is Edward Cullen" I sighed shaking my head in fake shame, "Oh and looky there the bell" I stated jut as the bell rung. I waved to my human friends and made my way to my next class, and how ironic it may seem, bioigy.

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**_Read and Revew. Any advice or comments for future chapters will be greatly appreciated!_**


	3. Strings and Irony

**Sorry for the lateness! School is lagging me behind, oh and Kakabell I need a description of a boyfriend you would like to have! :D READ ON~**

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As it would have it Edward Cullen is in my biology class- again. Which don't get me wrong still is humorous but it brings back unwanted memories. But I bring on my happy facade and waggle my eyebrows at him as I sit in front of him.

"Pleasure to have you, Cullen" I snicker leaning back in my chair and making spit-well you could say venom- bubbles.

"Why did I get stuck with you?" Edward growled rubbing his temples in annoyance. Ha, take that you freak of a bastard! I'm stuck with you all year buddy.

"Because it is fate my dear homo-sexual friend, we are meant to be!" I scuff under my breath but a few giggles escape my mouth making some heads turn in my direction. I grinned sheepishly at them, they rolled their eyes ignoring me, and I glanced up at the opening door. Here comes my new human pal.

"This should be interesting, jeje" Nashaly giggled sitting beside Edward. Yep this is getting better by the moment.

"My wish has officially been granted, thank the lord, two of my favorite people sitting right behind me!" I laughed loud enough to where the teacher glared at me. I stopped immediately but kept an amused grin on my face as I turned my chair all the way around to sit in front of Nashaly. "Sorry I left in a rush" I apologized.

"No worries" Nashaly stated waving it off, "the whole cafeteria couldn't leave until they got out of their laughing fit" she giggled as she glanced at Edward who scowled at the window he was looking out of, "Sorry, Edward, but we haven't had any humor lately" She said covering her mouth to stop giggling.

"You are forgiven" Edward stated but glared pointedly at me, a growl making his throat vibrating. "But he isn't".

"That hurts" I sniffed whipping away none existent tears, "Victor, Edward Cullen is making fun of your beloved little brother!" I whined when I saw that Victor walk in running a hand through his short dark red hair.

"please excuse my little brother's behavior, he really is a sweet guy" Victor nodding his head to Edward while taking a seat next to me and patting my head like I was a puppy. I grinned happily, Victor was my favorite family member just because he played along with my behavior and stood up for me.

"Hard to believe" Edward grumbled crossing his arms tightly over his chest.

"Afraid your man boobies might show?" I asked innocently, but I still received a playful punch to the arm from Victor as he tried to hold back a laugh, Nashaly was having trouble; she had to turn her head and hold her sides to stop from laughing, but Edward glared at me again, I swear if I wasn't gay I would have to cross Edward off of my friendly list. "What?" I asked my eyebrows furrowing and I tilted my head to the side to look even more innocent.

"Okay, Class has officially started!" the teacher, Mrs. Johnson, stated clapping her hands together with a grin. "Get out your utensils and lets get crackle lackin'". I cracked a grin while Edward groaned, oh I love the way things turn out, don't you?

"And so, the love story between two gays begin" I heard Nashaly mutter under her breath, and I heard no humor in it, just a smile… did she seriously thing I was going to fall in love with Edward?.... _Again?_

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"Are you purposefully making Edward hate your guts?" Leanne whispered to me as we did our daily mile run. I had the luck of having all three human friends in my gym class, the last period of the day.

"why would you say that?" I asked frowning. I loved acting! Maybe I should take Nashaly up on her offer. "I just want to become good friends with him- humor is the key right?"

"Maybe the gay key.." Melissa scuffed under her breath, but I naturaly smirked. "Oh, did you hear that?" She asked blushing fully in embarresment.

"Hear what?" I asked laughing as I picked up my pace to try and finish the mile faster. We were infront of alot of people but we still lagged behind some others.

"Hey wait up Blesser!" Nashaly gasped pushing for a higher pace and kept a level one with mine. "Are you still going to the cross country try outs?" She asked with a bright smile. She reminded me so much of Angela. Another string tugged on my heart and this time I couldn't surpress my flinch at the pain that came out. Angela Webber was the one that helped me finish my high school year before I changed my I.D. and all. I need to visit her grave soon, as well as my fathers.

"You okay, Blesser?" Nashaly's voice broke me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah, sorry" I stated clearing my throat and grinned sheepishly, "and yeah, I'm so going to the tryouts after school" I answered slinging my arm around her shoulders, which was kind of awkward when your jogging through a track field. Oh well.

"Cool" Nashaly laughed out throwing her head back. "Hey would you like to ride home with me today? I noticed you guys came with your parents and I wanted you to meet my boyfriend- he's home schooled so he doesn't come here".

I thought it through my head really quickly, it couldn't hurt, I don't do much but stay in my room. "Couldn't hurt, Sure" I answered patting her shoulder.

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	4. Reincarnation

**Hello again! I had a rough time writing this but I hope this will be good to read, thank you to all my readers! READ ON~**

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"That was so great" Nashaly squealed jumping up and down in her spot as I just continued to stare at her. Hyper was the only work that I could think of to describe her at this moment.

"Think we did good?" I asked scuffing a laugh that rose up in my throat. Cross Country was great, I had to agree with her on that, I never knew how many clumsy people there really were. I guess I was just too clumsy as a human and was too focused on my feet to notice other clumsy-partners. I kept a pace with Nashaly since I didn't want to attract attention.

"We did awesome!" Nashaly cheered running along while lugging me by the collar of my shirt. "the coach even congratulated us! We are so going to get in the team". Overconfident much?

"The coach told everyone 'great job' Nash', so don't get your hopes up" I chuckled as she stopped by what I presumed to be her car. I immediately whistled. A nice shiny Bunch buggy, decorated with pealing off stickers of different bands- Muse standing out the most considering that most of them consisted of the band title. "Nice bug" I stated with a huge grin plastered on my face.

"Like it? My boyfriend, Vincent, said it brung out my personality perfectly, jeje" Nashaly laughed opening the passengers side for me and skipped over to the drivers side to open it. "I think you two will get along great, with all of your humor but sincerity" Nashaly explained when both of us were in her vehicle and were driving off the total opposite direction of the Cullen's old house.

"Vincent, cool name, goes along with Victor well" I snickered covering my mouth. Vincent and Victor, what a thought.

"My Vinnie Bear is all mine, and he's so straight" Nashaly huffed while huffing up a peice of hair in the process.

"Please excuse me, Nashaly, I meant no offense- it is difficult for me to be serious at times" I apologized giving her a weak smile.

"Okay, geez, you don't have to apologize, you worry too much Stingher" Nashaly sighed but there was something in her voice.

"What do you mean?" I asked my eyebrows furrowing trying to think back and see if I had said something a bit too personal...

"I can see through you" Nashaly stated with a shrug and then a smirk. "Sorry, I'm kind of strange at times- forget what I said I'm just thinking things through too hard".

I waved it off but I couldn't shake off the feeling that she had actually saw through one of my facaides- but which one? It frightened me just to think of it. But it could be true, proven by none other than me. I had found out the truth about Edward, so why couldn't Nashaly.

I would just have to be more careful around her.

"This is Vincent's house, cool hu?" Nashaly asked as we pulled up into a two story blue house. It was beautiful, gardens spread out everywhere in the front yard and tall oak trees fanning around it, almost embracing it. There were little windows though, strange, you would think that in a place like Forks, Washington you would want as much sunlight as possible. I shrugged, people like different things.

"Amazing, I love all the colors" I stated jumping out of the vehicle and bounded my way to the doorstep.

"Hey wait for me, Blesser" Nashaly called out running after me. After giving me a humorous glare she rang the doorbell and a few seconds later a heard light footsteps bounding to the doorstep. I stiffened immediately. It couldn't be, could it? I glanced at Nashaly quickly, she was smiling brightly, swinging her arms as she waited. I sniffed the air around me and sure enough my presumption was correct.

Nashaly Kakabell was dating a vampire, vegiterian by the smells of it.

"Love" Was the first thing out of the vampires mouth as he opened the door with a sincere smile. He was tall, Edward tall, with short, sleek, black hair pulled back neatly, Deep golden eyes that glimmered with love, not hunger, as he gazed at Nashaly. Did he even notice me?

I cleared my throat and stuck out my hand right infront of his chest that had a white pollo over it.

Nashaly snapped out of her love daze and grinned sheepishly at me. "Sorry, Vincent" she addressed her boyfriend who politely looked at me with a kind glint in his eyes. Didn't he know that I might be dangerous? He should be cautious and protective over his mate.. what's with this one? "This is a foreign student that just showed up at Forks High, his name is Stingher Blesser, he's my new friend!" At this she giggled and then turned to me fully, litterally bouncing in her place.

"Blesser, I would like you to meet my _straight_ boyfriend, Vincent Glimheart" Nashaly introtuced and my waiting hand was taken in with Vincents warm one and shaken. Vincent raised his eyebrows at her statement, Nashaly quickly emmended, "Blesser here is gay".

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Stingher Blesser, and I thank you for befriending my girl" Vincent laughed giving my hand one last shake and wrapped his hand around Nashaly's waist. "We can talk about it later, just the two of us, friend" he whispered in vampire speed still smiling sincerely at me.

The sight before me tugged at my heart like never before, them right there, proof that vampires and humans could love eachother, a living reincarnation of me and Edward a hundred years ago.

I was happy for Nashaly, but it brought up too many bad memories.

"Could we speak now, please?" I asked Vincent quietly in a slightly choked up voice low enough to where only he could hear it.

"Could you go up and get my parents, Nashaly? They're in the library" Vincent giving Nashaly a kiss on the lips making her blush, then she quickly nodded and ran to the stairs. "Is something the matter, Stingher?" he asked fully facing me with a confused face.

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**_Read and Review. Any advice or comments for future chapters will be grealy appreciated!_**


	5. The better side

**Hello again, I'm trying to make up for my lost time so here it is! Thanks for all the fantastic reviews, I feel tingly inside! Specail thanks to Kakabell (Your long reviews make me want to jump into the computer screen and tackles you), AlexCullen54321 (You're funny hehe), Carlisle 23 (You keep me trucking all the humor out of Stingher), Sinthya Van Dan and Kendye (For being one of the few who actually review, I look forward to your reviews all the time XD ) Time-4-fun (Your user name is very inspiring!) Major Grai (I just wanna huggle you each time you review, and lastly Le-Le (you are so funny and helpful at school.. yeah) READ ON~**

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_"Is something the matter, Stingher?" he asked fully facing me with a confused face._

"What you're doing isn't smart" I hissed my eyes tightening on him. I couldn't let Nashaly go through the same pain I went through. "If you leave her she will be crushed" I stated my fists clenching.

"I'm not going to leave her" Vincent laughed quietly covering his mouth to try and be polite but failing so.

"Believe me, even if something as terrible as her finding out what I am comes along I will still be around for her" he explained smiling softly but his saying was a statement, nothing more.

"Wait" I sighed holding my head for a moment to catch my thoughts. Everything was hurtling down from the past. Jasper's hungry eyes, glass, cut then pain. "You will leave her, that's what always happens.." I muttered more to myself then to Vincent as a reassurance . If Edward hadn't had to leave me then why did he? Why couldn't he be as confident as this vampire standing right in front of me?

"Who, calm down, Stingher, your getting me confused" Vincent said hurriedly raising his hands up in defense as if I was attacking him with something… Okay is this guy a lunatic, cause if he is can I shake him until he realizes that sooner or later he _will_ leave Nashaly behind!

"Please don't" Vincent murmured so lowly that I barely caught it, but I did and froze in my spot while staring at him astonished.

"Y-you can read my mind?" I asked frightened, my male voice going into high notes making a shrill sound. If he could read minds then how can he read mine? I'm a shield, this can't be happening. Have I lost my ability? Aw crap and I thought I was actually embarrassing the undead crap out of Edward Cullen…

"No, why.. Oh oops. Forgive me I forget what my gift gets it's answers from" Vincent grinned sheepishly at me, and right before I was going to ask him what the hell was going on he interrupted me. "Sorry I should have explained it before we even started this talk. I have a gift that lets me know the vibe and intentions of a person, including myself".

I just stared at him like a complete bum. Are you kidding me? Vibes and intentions? So he already knew I was good even before he met me? He knew my intentions towards his mate were harmless and friendly?

"Confusing but it's all a feeling I get... Are we still friends?" Vincent asked hesitantly offering me his hand. I sighed and put on the gayest smile I could muster up and giggled before shaking his hand with a jerk.

"Of course we're friends my man, just spooky to know you know what I'm feeling and what I want to do" I stated laughing it off and skipping past him into his house. I let out a whistle.

"Spacious am I current" A soft voice giggled from behind me, I twirled around, trying to act like a ballerina but failing miserably, and saw who I presume to be Vincent's mother. Tall, petite, and could be placed right in with the era of dragons and princesses. She had bleach blond hair curled all the way down to her knees, gold eyes matching her beautiful flowery gown she wore that fit every curve perfectly.

"Princess" I chuckled bowing down respectfully making Nashaly laughed, who I guess was behind her. I quickly straightened my back grinning at her. "You look gracious, my lady" I stated though I couldn't wipe of the grin that was on my face.

"You are so sweet, Nashaly always picks out the good ones" Vincent's mother laughed, her voice jingling like soft bells, "My name is Amber Glimheart, you I presume are the famous Stingher Blesser Nashaly has been going on and on about since she found me in my study room" Amber introduced herself with a sweet smile and her voice held a light joyful setting, like she didn't have a problem in the world.

"That would be mwah" I stated and earned laughs from the three people around me. It sounded nice, like I actually belonged, the Maxwell family never made me feel like this… I guess they never had time to laugh things off, those people were too close to their mates- which don't get me wrong is great but sometimes you need to let in loners.

"It's nice to hear beautiful voices in the afternoon, lads" a different voice entered the room of voices making turn to another entrance in the home of Vincent's. I quickly looked back and forth between Vincent and who I now know is his father, for sure. The looked so much alike… could they be really blood related?

"Yes" Vincent answered laughing at my darting eyes while giving me a good slap on the back, I quickly stuck my tongue out at him. Meany.

"Hey, are you guys having a conversation about me?" Nashaly whined hopping her way over to Vincent's side and hugging one of his arms to his chest. She gazed up at him with love and adoration. I smiled at them, accepting that things happen that won't always be to my liking. "Come on, can't I get in on the secret?" at this Nashaly started pouting, jutting out her lip.

"I see we have a new friend, pleasure to meet you, son, my name is Andrew Glimheart" Vincent's father, Andrew, chuckled walking up to me and upraising his hand which I happily shook up and down in a girly manner. This made him laugh releasing my hand and ruffling my hair.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Glimheart, the names Stingher, Stingher Blesser" I laughed along with him and jumped up locking his neck in my arm and gave him a long Noogie. Andrew Glimheart had dark midnight black hair, just like his _blood_ son Vincent, that was a bit longer, fitting in a ponytail, and he had the exact same expressive golden eyes as Vincent too. "Any chance you can ditch your woman and become my man?" I whispered kissing his cheek.

Vincent laughed loudly, if he wasn't a vampire he would have been in tears, and fell to the floor bringing Nashaly down with him who _was_ in tears, clutching her sides in amusement. Heck even Amber was laughing, leaning on the staircase rail for unneeded support.

"Sorry, son, but I made the vows and all, stuck with her for eternity" Andrew scuffed giving me another ruffle to the head before stepping forward to embrace Amber in a quick hug. I love these people.

"Well that sucks, I guess I am destined to be with that meany man Cullen after all" I sighed shaking my head in fake disappointment, though I hoped that I really wasn't destined to be with Edward, he told me he didn't love me meaning that I wasn't meant for him. I quickly pushed the thought away and smiled idiotically.

"Aw, don't worry, Edward will warm up to you" Nashaly giggled while still gasping for breath, being pulled up by Vincent who was also smiling idiotically like me.

"He's blind, let me say that, I'm the prettiest gay you'll see in the market these days" I chuckled winking at Nashaly who had to laugh out yet again.

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	6. Far from it

**Yes, I know, late as always. Anyways please forgive me, Kakabel I put something that we talked about in here, but you might not get it right away... READ ON~**

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"Well, sorry to cut your visit short, Blesser, but I got to go" Nashaly said in an amused tone and under her breath she giggled, " Even though it was my visit, but let's not ruin his fun".

I laughed quietly and turned around quickly so she wouldn't see I heard her. Man if I could I would say that she was funnier than me!

"AW, come on Nash', I just got a new friend that's male and isn't someone I want to date!" I whined but quickly said turning to Vincent, "No offense to you, Vincent, but you're more like a friend to me and you're already taken".

"No offense taken, my friend!" Vincent laughed holding his stomach and throwing his head back.

Nashaly rolled her eyes and looked down at her phone for the time.

"I can't stay here any longer, Blesser. Unless you have another way of transportation…" Nashaly trailed off as I winked at her. She raised her eyebrow at this.

"No worries" I stated with a grin and then looked at Andrew who cracked a grin at me, "I'm sure I can find a way home, I needed to talk with Vincent and his family anyway".

"Are you sure, I don't want you stealing away my boyfriend while I'm away" Nashaly teased sticking out her tongue at me.

"Who said I was going for your boyfriend?" I asked waggling my eyebrows at Andrew, who in return held his throat tenderly and fake gagged.

"Sorry, sweet, but he's all mine" Amber giggled latching onto Andrew.

"Well, guess I'll just have to go with woman" I stated turning my eyes on Amber but she was immediately grabbed, gently, by Andrew who sent a playful glare my way.

"Well, what's it gonna be, Blesser?" Nashaly laughed out while she fished her keys out of her back pockets, "man where are those dang things?".

"Try your front pockets" Vincent chuckled kissing her cheek and reached into her front right pocket for her, seconds later he pulled out her car keys.

"Woh there, Romeo, are you sure you were looking for her keys?" I gasped covering me mouth, trying to hold back laughter to make it seem a bit like a statement- but me being my fake gay self, I laughed my butt off.

"You are just plain nasty, Blesser" Nashaly grumbled while her face radiated bright red.

"Sorry, trying to lighten up the mood" I giggled patting her back.

"Lighten the mood up my ass" Nashaly mocked sticking out her tongue before waving at Vincent's parents and skipping out the door, "Good luck Mr. And Mrs. Glimheart, you've got a handful with you!".

"Thank you, dear, I think we can handle him" Amber shouted back with a grin gracing her lips.

"Hey! You know I'm right here" I pouted stomping my foot as lightly as possible.

"Yes, Stingher, we could never forget you" Vincent murmured shaking his head before smiling warmly, "I believe you have a story to share with us, Stingher?"

My throat clenched up and suddenly I was nervous. I was going to share my secret with them wasn't I? But how? Change back into my original form and say something along the lines of "Yeah, I'm a girl, so you don't have to call me gay". Not going to work.

"It might, if you show us" Vincent spoke up as he lead us into his kitchen and sat on the stools provided around the small island they had.

"Stop doing that" I sighed rubbing my forehead as I gazed up at their ceiling.

"Just tell us, Stingher, we will understand no matter what" Amber spoke up from her spot on Andrew's lap.

"Okay.. Here goes everything" I sighed and sat up straight , looking at each of them in the eye, "I'm not gay, far from it".

"Dear that-" Amber started saying her eyebrows furrowing but was politely cut off.

"That's not it, Mother" Vincent stated calmly, touching her shoulder before turning back to me.

"I'm young, for a vampire at least, only a hundred years old" I explained, "I knew all about vampires before I got turned, used to date one. I thought nothing could happen, but it did".

"That's why you were trying to warn me about leaving Nashaly" Vincent pointed out a frown tugging on his face.

"_If you leave her she will be crushed"_

"She left you" Amber stated, getting close but not so close.

"**He** left me" I corrected redirecting my gaze, "As I assume you all heard, I was crushed, depression took a hold of me and things turned upside down for the next two and final years of my human life".

"You said you're not gay.." Andrew thought out loud scratching his chin.

"Stingher Blesser doesn't exist" I said bracing myself for what was soon going to come, "He is just a name, nothing more, you have to get that, I'm not real, just a hoax". I know it isn't the best way to say things, but I couldn't say it bluntly, it was just too unbelievable.

"I don't understand, Sting- whoever you are" Vincent mumbled shaking his head in confusion, "why are you lying to everyone, is there any need for it?".

"Every need, every second of my existence I never regretted what I did those last two years, it saved my sanity" I stated looking down at my hands, "sure I broke the law, but it was better than shattering my heart"

"What are you saying?" all three Glimheart's asked at the same time, eyes searching for something.

"Love sucks" I stated, my male voice dying into my real, natural, voice as I watched my hands reshape into smaller ones, smoother, and my arms thinning, "especially when it's from a vampire" . I looked up at them fully as my body completely reshaped itself and showed them my feminine side, literally.

"Oh, dear" Amber gasped as I saw my reflection in her eyes, wide scared eyes with a sickly heart shaped face. Monstrosity.

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	7. Old friend

**I know I have people that are upset, but School is hard- SUMMER ROCKS! READ ON~

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_"Oh, dear" Amber gasped as I saw my reflection in her eyes, wide scared eyes with a sickly heart shaped face. Monstrosity._

I looked back down in shame and bit my lip. How I wanted to rip my disgusting, lying, face off- to forget all the sins.

"What a unique ability.." Andrew murmured making me flinch. Ability? You call this ability? I bit down harder on my lip to keep my composure.

"A curse" I stated not daring to look up from my lap. What would I see? Disgust or hurt? Anger or shame?

"Well, Miss, could we have your name so I can politely correct you?" Vincent's voice came right next to me and a hand was on my shoulder. I looked up at him cautiously and my eyes widened in shock. He was smiling! How in god's name could he be smiling when I was lying through my teeth to them for such a long amount of time?

"Dear, you have nothing to be afraid of, we all have our secrets- this one is extreme and a bit unbelievable, but it can be worked through" Amber cooed as another, a different, hand appeared on my other shoulder. I looked to the side and saw Amber smiling sweetly, a sparkle in her motherly eyes.

I looked back down at my lap contemplating my situation. Is this why I trusted them in the beginning? They radiated understanding? Or Vincent reminded me of what Edward could have been to me the way he is to Nashaly? Both?

"Dear, what is your name? Why won't bite" Andrew stated and I couldn't help but let a laugh escape me from his last statement. Sure, Stingher Blesser was a disguise but he still lived in me. The joys of having dry humor..

".. It's Bella, Isabella Swan" I said after I collected myself and looked up at all the Glimheart's. They stopped to think and process it through and let another smile grace their faces.

"What a beautiful name" Amber sang rubbing my shoulder soothingly, "so original also, fits you perfectly, Bella". I let a smile tug at my face before I let my shoulders sag. What a relief. They trust me enough to take this as lightly as anyone could.

"Well, now we have something to worry about, you may actually steel me away from Nashaly!" Andrew laughed calming the air for everyone making me silently thank him.

"Nah" I stated rubbing my eyes out of habit, I always felt different in my real image, like I was facing reality, "love sucks, remember?".

"I'm sure it doesn't, you just have to cope" Amber said patting my shoulder and pulled me off the stool I had sat on, "now, let me get a good look at your beautiful form, Dear". I straightened myself and immediately became self-conscience about my looks. I wasn't as perfect as any vampire, especially compared to Vincent's family.

My body started reforming itself at my uneasiness. You could say that Stingher Blesser was my defense to face reality and win. He was my delusion.

"I'm sorry" I apologized, noticing I was back in my male form, and looked down in embarrassment.

"No need to worry, right Stingher?" Vincent said ruffling my hair making me grin up at him lazily. Vincent caught on quickly- I was to be anyone but Isabella Swan in this form, no need for anyone knowing who I am.

"Correct, my straight friend!" I boomed out laughing locking his neck in my arm and giving him a noogy. It was strang, mood swings if you want to call it, but I felt freerer.

"You need to learn, Dear" Amber sighed sadly making me quiet down and scratch my neck as I looked up at her uneasily, "this isn't who you are, you have been in the habit to hide your clean spirit, you have to end it before it backfires on you".

"I know" I said sighing. I did know, too, but I didn't want to worry about it. It was a habit I wasn't going to regret, but I know one day I'm going to loose everyone I hold dear because of it- and I deserve it too, "I'm too selfish".

"Far from it" Amber said leaning back against Andrew who had come around the table behind her, "we can take this step by step, I know it is hard to know that someone knows your secret".

I grinned and nodded.

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"So?" Nashaly asked the next day at school in history class. I was doodling on a scrap piece of paper at the time so I looked up at her and grinned while raising my eyebrow in question, "you know, with Vincent and his family?".

"We got our groove on" I cackled receiving a light punch from Nashaly, "don't worry, your man is still straight, can't say the same thing about Andrew though- I think he's leaning towards men more than Amber now".

"You better not ruin their marriage, Blesser" Nashaly mumbled rolling her eyes with a smile, "what did you guys talk about?".

"This, that" I said waving it off, "gay marriages and all, if Eddie thinks about marriage I'll be the first to know what to do".

"I'm sure you will" Nashaly muttered before snorting and started packing before the bell rang. Guess time passed by without my notice. I glanced up at the clock and saw that we had about two minutes before we had to move out of the class. I looked down lazily at my doodle and cocked my head in question. What in the world lead me to drawing this?

I picked up the paper and stared at the pair of menacing eyes staring right back at me. They seemed.. familiar, but I guess I have seen a lot of eyes lately, so I shouldn't ponder on it.

"What's that?" Nashaly asked looking at the paper with me.

"Mrs. Cullen's evil glare when I tell her her son has gone to the gay side" I said proudly while nudging her lightly.

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"Still think Edward has a grudge on you?" Melissa asked as she slowly ate her organic salad and glanced around me at the Cullen table. I looked and smirked, the whole table was still looking away from one another but Edward was glaring pointedly at me.

"Psch! Of course not, he's fantasizing about me is all" I stated winking at Edward who curled his lip in a silent growl, I smirked wider.

"Sure he is" Leanne said under her breath while shaking her head in disablement.

I was about to correct her when my cell phone, which I totally forgot I still had from my human years, went off, playing '_who let the dogs out_'. I blinked in surprise, why would puff ball be calling?

"Your phone..." Leanne pointed out raising an eyebrow at my choice of ring tone.

"It suits him perfectly" I pointed out, "now excuse me, this man is cheating on his dog for mwah". With that I left the cafeteria in a fast pace but winked at Edward who glared my way. Once I was far enough to where I knew the Cullens wouldn't eves drop I opened the phone.

"What can I do for you, Jake?" I asked looking up at the sky and stared at the sky, letting my female voice go through my throat to my best friend.

Yes, you are all wondering "What the hell?". I did tell you no one knew I was a female- well Jake only knows me as a female, so I wasn't lying.

"When are you visiting? I heard you moved back into Forks, Bells', you promised to keep in touch no matter had badly I stunk" Jake's voice came in smoothly over the phone.

I rolled my eyes and muttered, "Sensitive dogs..".

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_**Read and Review. Any comments or advice will be greatly appreciated!**_

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	8. Pay Back Coming Your Way

**Hello! Glad to be back in business, hope you enjoy this- sorry if you're Jaccob haters :( ! READ ON~**

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_"When are you visiting? I heard you moved back into Forks, Bells', you promised to keep in touch no matter had badly I stunk" Jake's voice came in smoothly over the phone._

_I rolled my eyes and muttered, "Sensitive dogs.."._

"I am not sensitive" Jake corrected smugly but I heard a throaty, muffled, laugh in the background. Who on earth was with him? Probably Seth..

"Sure you're not, bucko" I said with a laugh and glanced behind me, making sure no one was eaves dropping on my conversation. I saw none so I looked back up to the sky watching as a couple birds fly by.

"Putting that of to the side, are you coming or not?" Jake asked with a whine.

"Actually can you pick me up? I wanted to visit Charlie's grave but never got a chance to…" I mumbled awkwardly. I did miss Charlie and I felt guilty for ruining his last few years of his life by sulking my life away.

"Of course!" Jake yelled and I could just imagine his not-so-fake-but-not-in-place-yet tail wagging in excitement. "Where are yeah?" he asked and I could here his bike keys jingling.

Did I really want him to come to Forks High School? If he did then that would mean that I would have to change back into my normal form while avoiding almost all of the school, especially the Maxwell family and the Cullens. It's going to be a pain but I guess if I hid in the woods by the school I could pull it off.. But I don't want to take the chance.

"I'm gonna give you an address to pick me up at- take your time I need to get there first" I said quickly as I gave him the address and hung up on him. "Sorry, but I need to hurry" I murmured back into my male voice and scurried back into the cafeteria and made my way to Nashaly.

"Heya, Blesser, where did you go?" Nashaly asked once she saw me but I just grinned and picked her up by the forearms and directed her out of the cafeteria and winked at Edward again before I left- he naturally glared back but at least he wasn't ignoring me. "Where are we going?" Nashaly asked when I walked her all the way to her car.

"We're visiting your sadly straight and already taken by you boyfriend, Vincent" I stated grinning broadly.

"..Why?" Nashaly asked but none the less fished her keys out of her pocket and opened the bug's doors and we both got in.

"I have to stop by a friends house that lives near him" I stated with a smile as I laid my feet up on the key board.

"Parents can't take you?" Nashaly asked, "not that I don't enjoy taking you so I can see Vinnie Bear but just wonderen'".

"Parents busy" I stated with a shrug and eagerly watched as we began to get closer and closer to Vincent's house. Truth is this will be good so Vincent can make sure Nashaly is okay while I go a few houses down and switch back into my original form. Good.

"Got it" Nashaly said with a clap of her tongue against the roof of her mouth and pulled her buggy around the corner and gave the view of Vincent's not-to-shabby house. "Well have fun at your friends's house, Blesser!" Nashaly sang literally jumping out of the car and ran to Vincent's front door. Gosh, addicted much?

_You're like my own personal Brand of Heroine._

I flinched at the reminder that rang in my head before shaking it off and stepped out of the vehicle. Why do things pop up in the worst of times?

I sighed running a hand through my hair before walking past Vincent's house and passed the next four until I stopped at the only vaccant one in the whole lot.

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"You don't look a day past twenty, Bella!" Seth laughed when he saw me step off of Jake's prehistoric bike and shaking the wind out of my hair.

"Hardy, Har, Har, Seth" I sighed rolling my eyes before I actually looked around the place I had left long, long, ago. "Nothing changed, hu?" I asked looking at Jake who grinned sloppily at me.

"Why would it? Looks fine to me" Jake laughed lugging an arm around my shoulder and lead me into his slightly improved house, "though I do have a bigger room I am glad to say". Yes, I faintly remember his room to be cramped. Poor Puppy.

"Good for you, Jake" I snorted looking around the house once I entered, it seemed out of place without Billy and Charlie joking with beers in their hands, joking around about the game they were watching. I should be gone with them. "I miss Billy" I told Jake out loud, shrugging and flopped myself down on the couch.

"That is why we're going to the cemetery, for him and your father, remember?" Jake snorted though I knew that he also missed Billy just as much as me, "Now let me grab a snack and we'll wait 'till it's dark" with that he skipped away to the kitchen. I rolled my eyes, aren't they always hungry?

"Why wait?" I asked looking up and blankly watching as the fun continued to spin 'round and 'round.

"No one's at the cemetery at night, want to get in my fur" Jake called out with a muffled voice- probably shoved a cold piece of pizza in his mouth or something close to that. What a funny sight to see.

"Nice term" I complemented closing my eyes and tried to think of something to pass the time, "what time is it?" I asked raising my voice to an unnecessary pitch.

"Five, gonna wait a couple more hours 'till we move out" Jake explained back to me and a few pans fell from the cupboard along with a string of curse words.

"I'll be back before then" I called out and jumped off of the couch, dusting off the none-existent dust off my REALLY baggy jeans. I hadn't changed from my male attire and Jake gladly complemented on it when he picked me up. Damn Hypocrite.

"Where yeah goin'?" Jake asked poking his head out of the kitched with a soda in hand.

"Visiting" I stated waving a goodbye to him and left without another word. It had been in my mind for a day or two now, this thought of mine, I had missed the Cullens- I got over them, at least that's what I'm pretty sure of- and wanted to scare the living doodoo out of them. I wasn't ready, emotionaly, to face them in this form when they'll be able to recognise me as Bella, but I wanted them to know I was still _alive_.

My plan being to show up as Blesser, and say that I said "Hello", I won't say it so bluntly but I will say that I knew me as a human and had just remembered that she talked about the Cullens and how they left her. Somethin' along the lines of that, if you're following me.

I made sure I was way out of La Push before I uh.. _morphed _back into Blesser.

"Glad to be back" I sighed putting my hands behind my head and made my way to the Cullen household. Wonder how they would react to me showing up at their doorstep and then mentioning knowing Bella as a human... a bit after telling them she's alive and I have contact with her.

I grinned to myself. No matter how gulty it is to mess with them, I wanted them to feel what I had felt and am still feeling every now and then.

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	9. quote Life sucks, then you die unquote

**Hello! sorry it took awhile, had to make my brain think. WARNING FOUL LANGUAGE AND MATURE SCENE LATER ON, warning is put before mature scene so you can read on then skip it... you might miss alot if you don't read it but it's not 'you have to read'. I usually don't use this language or scenes this sexaul but it had to be for the plot! So sorry. READ ON~**

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_"Glad to be back" I sighed putting my hands behind my head and made my way to the Cullen household. _

_Wonder how they would react to me showing up at their doorstep and then mentioning knowing Bella as a human... a bit after telling them she's alive and I have contact with her._

_I grinned to myself. No matter how guilty it is to mess with them, I wanted them to feel what I had felt and am still feeling every now and then._

I had taken my time when going to the house of the Cullen's. I felt a bit jittery but I needed to control my excitement so Jasper wouldn't get suspicious- that would just blow my cover right there.

By the time I reached the door I was completely calm and had the game plan straight in my mind, I was willing to get yelled at by any of the Cullen's, knowing how much Bella was a sensitive subject with them.

"Knock, Knock!" I called out with a singing voice, grinning in pleasure as I stuck my hands in my pockets and stared at the door, waiting. I waited and waited, noting that barely any commotion was going on inside. Maybe they went out to hunt or something..

"Coming!" Alice's voice sang as I heard her footsteps go down the stairs super fast and the door flung open, revealing the short pixie herself. "Stingher, what a spectacular surprise, come in!" she literally sang this out, stepping aside to let me come in, which I did.

"Good evenin', Al" I laughed out as I looked around the house that I had once called a second home, "doing dandy I suppose?". I turned to her grinning widely and leaned back on my heals comfortably.

"As always!" Alice giggled skipping her way to me and then started circling me in a sort of hunter and prey thing, "why'r you here anywho? Everyone else is out hunting".

"Just wanted to check out your sweet home" I cackled, covering my slight disappointment for the loss of people, but hey, it's Alice, she probably saw me coming. "mind if I look around? You can be my enchanted tour guide" I winked at her at that comment, trying to keep my gay façade up.

"I would love to!" Alice giggled skipping to a stop in front of me and held out her hand, "we didn't get to a good start because of my brother, I'm Alice Cullen".

"No need to fret, your brother is just playing hard to get" I chuckled slipping my hand into hers and stated, "Stingher Blesser at your service".

It hurt my chest again, holding her hand, remembering the past where I considered her my sister, where we were so close and held no secrets… The hole was returning too quickly and I didn't like it.

"Funny name!" Alice giggled and did something I had expected her to do, she launched herself at me and hugged me, "I want to show you my room first!". With that said she grabbed my hand and dragged me upstairs.

"Man, this is gay paradise" I muttered with a smile seeing that her room hadn't changed at all except her wardrobe that had been re-stocked. "could I barrow some of your clothes? Eddie would sure start seeing the light then" this was fun, seeing how Alice immediately cracked up laughing.. But then I noticed what was off.

It was fake, all of it. If anyone was faking I knew it because I myself faked my whole existence. She had the far away look in her face, a tint of sadness in it, something lost.

I pushed that aside and acted as if I didn't even notice anything.

"I love my room, Jazzy always compliments my wardrobe" Alice giggled with a grin but again, it didn't reach her eyes, "no one would dare to say something bad about it, or else they would have a bad year".

Time to play.

"I can imagine you playing Barbie, my best friend said that she had a friend way back that loved dressing her up and called it-" I started carefree but was cut off by a stunned Alice.

"Bella Barbie?" Alice asked suddenly standing before me and gripped my shirt, desperation in her appearance and voice, a slight sparkle in her eyes.

"Nah, she called it "a blonde's fantasy", quite funny considering that she said her friend wasn't even blond but it was the friend's fantasy" I laughed it off even though the hole in my chest pulled threateningly. "But Bella Barbie sounds way better, who came up with that?" I asked.

"Someone in the family" Alice sighed sadly making me want to hit myself at the sight, no one could make Alice sad unless they took away her sight, but here I am saying the biggest lie making her all down.

"Oh? Rosalie? Highly doubt it, she doesn't seem the type to say that… maybe Emmett?" I asked tapping my finger against my chin thoughtfully.

"No, we.." Alice gulped nervously, "she was dear to us, but she pulled herself out of the family picture". It took a second but then Alice's fake smile reappeared and she giggled it off, "sorry, sad story".

I smiled on the outside but on the inside I was.. I couldn't be devastated, because this is what I expected, they would have made up something to erase me.. But it stirred rage inside me to hear that they blamed me for leaving, for dying. They were cowards to not face reality, blaming me for leaving instead of seeing that they're the ones that left, surely not me.

"A nomad? To bad she's not a boy, I would have totally tracked her down for you, I dig dudes that are nomads, they got the bling thing going on being all independent" I murmured grinning like I was in my own fantasy.

But how could Alice, Alice the one that wasn't afraid to show anyone what she was made of, lie like that? Second of all, why do I care? I was no longer Bella Swan, so I shouldn't hear it as if they were talking about me.

"She died, but it's all in the past now- onward to the next room!" Alice sang, but it was off note. I mentally sighed and followed her with my head tilted to the side, she soon noticed and asked, "you okay?"

"Your little speech reminded me exactly like my friends short one's, had a similar story, said that a whole coven left her alone, left her devastated, the coven persisted of her boyfriend, someone she thought could be her husband, soon mate." I stated looking as if I was deep in thought.

"You say it as if it was the same person I'm talking about, which is impossible because she's dead" Alice giggled but I caught the hope in her voice, the eagerness to hear of the person I was talking about.

"Well technically she is, no beating heart" I stated crossing my arms and nodded to her, like I see all those professors do in those soap channels to prove a point.

"Ha-ha, you know what I mean" Alice said sticking her tongue out and I saw the disappointment when we got to the next room, "this is Rosalie's room".

I was about to enter the room when Alice caught my arm and dragged me downstairs.

"Hey, what about the grand tour?" I asked with a whine, trying not to stumble and give her the hint that I was clumsy. Sure it was only a thing about me but if I did all the habits that Bella did when they knew her I know that Alice would get suspicious.

"I want to hear about your friend, I want to meat her, what's her name?" Alice asked excitedly as she lead me to the living room and plopped herself and me down on the couch that I faintly remember sitting on as a human. Guilt started to swell up in my heart but I quickly pushed it aside.

"She's nothing special, her words not mine by the way, says she's plain Jane" I stated with a shrug leaning back and rested my hands behind my head.

I heard Alice take a sharp intake of breath and looked at her with a raised eyebrow. I didn't show it but this was revenge, I'm not stupid, I know revenge gives you bad karma but this is something I had to do, show them how much they effected me by leaving me.

"Is something the matter, Al?" I asked touching her shoulder and squeezed it, "do you want me to call someone back from their trip to look at you? I can leave if I'm making you act up strangely.. Maybe I should, I have some plans anyhow.."

"NO!" Alice barked grabbing me by the collar of my shaggy shirt and then quickly threw her hand back, "sorry, but I would like you to stay, we haven't had any one new since…" she trailed off and looked up at me apologetically, "I would like you to stay if you could".

I smiled, and no matter how much I wanted it to be fake, to show that they can't do anything to make me happy again, it was real, a real smile brought up by one of the one's who abandoned me.

"No prob, Al, I'm all for making new friends just let me text my date saying I'm staying with a girlfriend at the moment" I giggled gaily, pulling out my old phone and out of the corner of my eye I saw Alice's eyes widen at the phone, "is something wrong? Nothing's coming out of my pants is there? I tend to do stuff when I think about my boyfriend" at that I checked my pants to make sure my joke held through, my appearance was of a guy, I'm still a girl. Like an illusion so I don't have… yeah even when I'm a vampire it is still very uncomfortable to talk about the differences between genders.

"She had the same phone, thought those went out of business seventy five years ago, where'd you get it?" again there was hope in here voice, something that pulled the hole wider as I continued to deceive.

"Same friend I've been talking about, she's all about oldies, loves classics, especially-" I stated a bounce in my voice to keep up the appearance but once again was cut off.

"Clair de-" Alice started but I cut her off. I hated to be reminded of that music, it reminded me too much of Edward, too much of his promises that were broken.

"Yeah, yeah, that one! How'd you know? She usually is too shy to interact with people" I said in a fake excited voice.

"Does she talk about any meadows that she may have went to when she was dating the guy in the coven that left her?" her voice was choked at the last part, knowing that it was the truth on her families behalf.

"To be honest she doesn't remember a whole lot about her human days" I stated not wanting to give away too much to make her believe that I was indeed talking about me.

"So she was human when they left her?" their was a more gleaming light in her eyes, truly believing me, hoping.

"Yep, she doesn't like to talk about her human days though, to harsh for her" I said with a shrug before looking down at my cell phone and opened it, texting Jake that I was busy with family matters and that I promised I would spend more time with him later.

"What's her name?" Alice asked urgently but before I could think of a way to get out of the situation the whole freakin' Cullen family chose the perfect time to come in from their hunt.

"My Eddie!" I squealed in a high pitch and ran to Edward with my arms outstretched but before I could embrace him his hand was pressed against my chest, though I did keep running in place, like you see in cartoons and it was fun!

"Why is he in our house, Alice?" Edward hissed with venom in his voice and he put force in his hand and made me stumble back and land on the floor butt first.

"He knows something about Bella!" Alice blurted out despite of herself and her excitement, "he says she's alive and is a vampire!".

I can't really comprehend what happened but I was picked off the ground and slammed into a wall, leaving a hole in it, Edward's eyes dark despite his previous hunting trip, teeth bared up at me with venom dripping continually.

"Edward! Let the poor thing go, you're being rude to our house guest!" Esme's sweet voice shouted our way but I couldn't concentrate on her, Edward was my distraction. I though I might really be eaten alive be him right now, and I was scarred, just like…

_I was walking through the meadow Edward used to take me to. It hurt me just to remember him but I had to do this, to show him how much I still love him. I had cut my hair two years ago changed everything to show how strong I was, to show that I could deal with his leaving me. But it was all for nothing._

_I still felt the pain every time I remembered him or his family, how many promises and memories they let me cry over. _

_Even my fake identity didn't help me at all, it just showed me how weak I really was, how much I couldn't face reality._

"_I deserve to go to hell and perish" I muttered dryly as I came to a stop directly in the middle of the meadow, knife in hand, mind ready. Everything ready to end it all, to release myself. I lifted the heavenly metal object and pointed it to my heart. My phone buzzed but I pointedly ignored it as it played 'who let the dogs out?'. Jake had been calling repeatedly, I was supposed to be at his house an hour ago after I promised a visit since Billy wasn't doing so well. He needed the support but I couldn't give it to him._

_What a monster I am._

"_What a pretty project" A sweet smooth voice whispered in my ear making me freeze in fear. Cold air rushed past my face making me shudder, "mind if I see the results? Or better yet let me add to it, see how my project would come?". It was a male's voice, a vampire's voice, but none that I used to know. _

**A/N If you cannot handle being mature, don't bother reading this. This is Teen rated, and everyone knows about this because you should be close or already have taken Health class. DO NOT READ if you cannot handle the reality of how some men/woman think. You have been warned so I don't want to hear complaints! **

_His body was pressed against mine and I faintly felt the bulge against my back. Oh god, oh god. Please don't let this be happening right now, I just want to end the pain not expand it. Let me die of my own hand not by some Vampire Raping._

**A/N Don't like where this is going don't read! Go past Italics if you cannot handle this.**

"_You might deceive all those mouth watering humans but you can't fool me, child" he chuckled making Goosebumps rise against me skin and my heart pump widely against my rib cage, pushing adrenaline through my immobile body. His hands found my waist and rested there. "Though if you wish to hide yourself like this, your wish is my command, but with a price"._

_My pants fell and I screamed minutes later, tears blurring my eyes as he penetrated my innocents. It hurt, so, so badly. I felt my hip bones cracking under his pressure making me scream louder. _

_I pushed against the meadow floor to try and get away but his strength over powered mine._

_Suddenly teeth embedded themselves in my neck but he still didn't stop his assault._

_This must be hell, one pain after another. I felt every bit of his venom enter my body and every crack of another bone._

"_You taste heavenly, child, despite your rambling of going to hell" the man chuckled licking my neck, "now you can live out without either to go to" He still didn't stop when I passed out. Even in the blackness of my conscience I was scarred, afraid…_

"Let him go, now!" a familiar voice cut through my faint remembrance that I wished I didn't remember now that I was out of it. I still heard Edward's snarls and my eyes were still opened, I knew that, but I didn't see anything but blackness. I couldn't snap out of it, I wanted to die at the memory, knowing that.. That that had happened. How such a sick man could ever do that.

"On the name of everything living and nonliving, let Stingher Blesser go!" this time I faintly remembered the voice and I clenched my eyes shot to straighten my mind out, but Edward's growls kept distracting me, reminding me of those horrible pains that I felt so clearly. "Stingher, do you hear me? Tell the boy to let you go!".

It was Andrew's voice, Andrew Glimheart. But how did he know I was in trouble? How did he know to come here?

"Can we all just calm ourselves?" Carlisle's stern voice was heard but Edward's grip on my shirt and growls did not stop, they increased.

"He knows about Bella, Carlisle, he knew about our situation all along and was being a selfish bastard letting us continue to suffer!" Edward snapped pushing me further into the wall.

"Edward stop!" Alice begged and I smelt her come nearer.

"Edward, your scaring him" Jasper spoke up.

"He needs to learn a lesson, to straighten up and mature himself!" Edward hissed.

"Edward, let him go" Vincent's voice came up, making me realize it was because of his ability that he knew I was in a tight situation, "Stingher, open your eyes, tell him to let you go".

I obeyed, trusting his judgment over anyone else's, and opened my eyes to see everything normally again, to see Edward's face inches from mine, his face full of rage. I gulped but didn't let him get what he wanted. To hell with Edward Cullen, he left me and he deserved everything that's coming his way.

I shook off everything, all the fear even though my memory still haunted my every move but I used that as something to keep me strong.

I grinned at Edward, making him fume even more, pushing me farther into the wall.

"You want to know something, Masen?" I asked using his proper name, making him freeze for a moment, "I heard from your sister that your saying that Bells' left you, 'cause I'm such a gay bastard I want you to go in a closet and lose your virginity 'cause you got to face reality, bucko, you left her but I guess in the end you're right" I smirked at his slightly baffled face, "she sure the hell made a new life for herself without your help, funny, thinking that the first time I met her she said she couldn't live without her precious Eddie, and now I think I've seen the fucking light also.

"What's so special about a man that left someone defenseless to fend for themselves when you, the man, had promised her that you would never leave her? Sure I understand the whole Jasper situation but that could have been sorted out, look at him now, no blood thirsty monster there, no sirrey. If only you stayed with her and fulfilled her one wish to be with you for eternity, think of how it would be right here, right now. I wouldn't be in your Mr. Shitting face with my rambling. Further more maybe I wouldn't have existed knowing how wrong a man could go with just one decision. So cut your crap about me needing to be straightened up and matured, I've faced reality and it's waiting for you to face it along with your guilt".

He didn't move, his eyes shocked and body stiff. I lifted my fist and before he or anyone else could stop it I had punched him square in the jaw, sending him flying off of me.

"Calm down, Stingher, we just want to know where Bella is so we can talk to her" Jasper said as I felt waves of calming came my way but I mentally shot them away, I didn't want his help.

"Better keep your trap shut, Cowboy, I'm not in a happy mood" I grumbled dusting myself off and made my way to Vincent and Andrew's side, who kept their stern faces directed at the Cullen's, especially Edward.

"You going to okay, Stingher?" Vincent asked finally shifting his eyes to me, "felt some nasty vibes coming from over here".

"Bro, I gotta thank you for saving my ass, thought I was going to get killed by Eddie" I sighed regaining my happy attitude making both of the Glimheart's smile in relief.

"Better get heading home, your mother is babysitting your girlfriend" Andrew said finally smiling and draiped an arm around each of our shoulders in a fatherly manner, "not my liking to find a coven ganging up on a loner" at this he shot Carlisle a look, "straighten up the coven, Cullen, before anyone gets hurt".

We were about to exit when the nagging at the hole in my chest started pulling again and I stopped to look over my shoulder and yell out to Alice, "Thanks, Al'! See yeah at school!" and with that we all three exited the Cullen household. Alice didn't deserve hurt, though she is the one that got Edward started.

"Hey you okay, Blesser? Heard you needed someone to pick you up" Nashaly giggled as we finally made it to the Glimheart's household.

"All dandy, just had to straighten Eddie out is all" I laughed hugging her off the ground, "how has your wonderful day with your boyfriend been? Get it on or anything? Mouth to Mouth? Hip to Hip? Hormonal-" I started rambling off, not knowing that I was listing off things that had happened to me before my complete changing occurred.

"Hold up, we didn't do anything!" Nashaly screamed her face flushed with a tint of red on her cheeks, making Vincent laugh out loudly and go to her side, hugging her while reassuring her quietly that I was just out of it at the moment.

"Stop lying to the girl!" I said sticking my tongue out at her but then something latched itself to me from the back, I glanced over my shoulder and smiled when I saw it was Amber, "hey, mum, whatcha' doin'?".

"Oh, sweety, I should ask you, Andrew told me everything" she whispered softly to me, a sob in her voice.

It caught me for a moment, thinking if my other adopted Mother, Margarita, would be this emotional if anything similar happened to me.

"I'm all good!" I laughed turning in her grasp and hugged her lightly, but as I was hugging her I caught sight of two heads peaking around the wall looking, no scratch that, staring at the scene. "well, well, looky who's here! Gonna' give my a hug or what?". It was Leanne and Melissa, who would have thought.

"In your dreams" Leanne snorted coming out from her hiding spot and crossed her arms stubbornly.

"Lizzy?" I asked pouting at the blond who looked at me with a 'not a chance, gay homo that's strangely my friend'. "fine be that way, break my poor heart" I sniffed and turned my back to them.

* * *

**_Read and Review. Any comments or advice for future chapters will be greatly appreciated!_**


	10. Reflection

_**So sorry! I know a lot of you are like WTF on me. School is all to blame.. Dedicated to Nashaly and Le!**_

So, here I am sitting in the Lockheart's kitchen, pondering on what I should do now that I blew up on Edward. I am certainly not going to have a pleasant time at school now that they know I have an aggressive and dare I say serious side? Well I'm completely serious but they don't know that.

I huffed out trying to relieve myself of stress. I hated when I got stuck, because when I got stuck, I got stuck really badly. It was two in the morning and I had to ditch Jake to think this through. He was okay about it, saying we have a couple years together, which may not be true if I can't stand to be with the Cullens when they have seen into my personality too much.

"Think.." I muttered resting my chin on the counter and running my tongue over my teeth. I glanced at my reflection on the counter and stared, watched as the stranger followed my every movement, like a parallel, eyes locking , hair dangling over my face, my golden eyes dull.

"You might hurt yourself there, Dear" Amber giggled passing by and ruffled my hair and pushed in back out of my face, "what's troubling you?" with that she plopped herself next to me on a stool and grasped my hand.

My body relaxed and my hand started changing, I stared at my reflection further, watching my face reshape, regain a heart shape, and lips puff out, eyes more expressive, and then it was done, I was me, the ugly me..

"I just ruined my whole appearance" I sighed giving her hand a squeeze before letting it go and run a hand through my hair.

"You're smart, you know what to do" Amber giggled, "maybe it is time to visit them, you know, like this" she waved her hand at my appearance.

"So they can imprison me and hear the story of how _I_ left _them_?" I snorted sneering at my reflection, "they blamed me for their sadness!".

"Maybe that's the only way for them to deal, the same way you use Stingher to deal" Amber said softly, patting my arm and then leaving.

Do I want to give up my identity right when I figured out the worst moment of my life as a human? I mean I still loved Edward despite all of this, I want him to be himself, not grumpy and emotional enough to be aggressive. I wanted my old life back.

"Stingher is a face, not a lie.." I muttered standing up from the stool I had been sitting on and ran a hand through my messy hair. I suppose I could go hunting in this body, nothing could hurt, I could just hunt away from the Cullen's hunting grounds. "See you later Mr. and Mrs. Lockheart, bye Vincent!" I called out grabbing my coat from the rack next to the front door before leaving them to their own time.

I guess I had hunted in Stingher's disguise for so long I had forgotten how light I really was, I was flying feeling like a feather, the earthy colors blaring past me with every step I took. I just wanted to fade away in this bliss, this endless but never changing feeling.

I jumped over a fallen tree and let myself breath in the spectacular, none polluted, air, enjoying how in circulated through my chest and then out, savoring it. I loved this kind of atmosphere, I loved it because it was my true home. The home I came to for so long before everything went wrong, where everything went wrong.

I huffed in another clump of air and exhaled it quickly, trying to distract myself from the negative thoughts. It wasn't healthy.

'_It doesn't hurt me, you wanna feel how it feels?' _My phone started singing out and made me stop in mid step and freeze, my face scrunching in pain as the hole in my chest tugged and expanded. I should've change- no deleted that number and song from my phone.

'_You wanna know, know, that it doesn't hurt me? You wanna hear about the deal I'm making?……and if I only could, make a deal with god and get him to swap our places.. I'd be running up that road, be running up that hill, be running up that mountain' _I closed my eyes and clenched my eyes closed, waiting for the song to pass along with the caller. Alice had mentioned about the phone, she had to have, know one but my new family, the dogs, and now the Glimhearts know my number.

The hole twitched and I flinched.

_.'. You don't wanna hurt me.. See how deep the bullet lies….. Their's a thunder in our hearts' _I am not going to answer the damn forsaken phone, no sirrey, not even going to reach for it because I am not risking my disguise. I am not risking for the pain.

'… _so much hate for the ones we love' _Why won't this phone stop? Did I really edit this so that it would ring this long? God, I need to change this.. I never knew that he would actually _call_. Why would he call anyway? To blow up on Stingher, to orally abuse him? To hurt him..

To hurt me?

'… _tell me we both matter don't we? you and me won't be unhappy' _The whole freaking song must be on here! God, why won't he hang up already? Doesn't he have a fucking life to get back to?

'… _Come on angel, come on darlin'.. _The hole tore and everything went into a pain filled frenzy. My knees buckled and the forest floor went straight towards my face.

No one caught me, they never are.

"Just go away" I sobbed wrapping my arms around my torso and started rocking back and forth, back and forth..

My eyes felt like they were weighted down by a ton of bricks, wanting to shed tears but not able to.

'_..lets exchange the experience'_

"_GO AWAY!" I screamed slamming my door closed in Charlie's face, leaning all my weight onto it as he pounded against my door continuously, trying to get in. Tears fell down my face as I stood my ground against the door being forced open. "I don't need you anymore! Go away and go to your fucking getaway station!"._

"_Bella! Bella, let me in this instant!" Charlie raged on, his fist banging and banging. Why the fuck does he care right now? He wasn't there when I needed him and now he suddenly notices? "Bella, now! I am the chief of police, I order you to open up now!"_

"_You don't care!" I screamed going down onto the floor to get a better grip, my back leaning back even further to stop the forced entry , "you may be the chief but you're not my fucking father! You didn't care, you didn't want anything to do with me!". I leaned my head back, my shortened hair getting in my face and my male clothes wrinkling under my distressed form._

"_Bella! You wouldn't talk to me, you never talk to me!" Charlie screamed his foot connecting with the door making my body jerk forward but I quickly pushed my body back against it, grunting as he put more pressure onto the door. _

"_You don't want to talk to me!" I screamed back holding back sobs._

"_I can't talk to you!" Charlie stated grunting as he put even more weight against me._

"_Why?! Because I'm too fucking much to handle?" I yelled my throat getting scratching, "just let me rot in hell! That's what I deserve right?"._

"_Don't talk like that!"_

"_You don't know anything about me"_

"_Bella!"_

"_Bella!"_

"_Bella?!"_

"_BELLA!"_

"Stingher?"

I blinked my eyes rapidly, trying to regain my eyesight to push the darkness aside. My body shook from the flashback. God, it hurt remembering. Did I really act that way towards my own father?

"Hey, Stingher, you look horrible" Nashaly's voice said, nervousness evident in her voice. I blinked once more and my eyesight was back in an instant. Nashaly was kneeling down in front of me, eyes slightly red around the edges, wet stains reflecting off of the dim moonlight up above us.. "you scarred the living poo out of me, bucko".

My eyes shot around. I was still lying in the middle of the forest floor, in a huddled position, in Stingher's body.

I shook off my fright and shakily got to my knees, stumbling a bit.

"Careful" Nashaly warned grabbing my arm and slinging it around her shoulder and lead me through some broken path I didn't notice was there before. I didn't know what was going on that much, I was in a haze, I couldn't feel my body.. "there's no signal up here, I tried calling Vincent but it didn't work" Nashaly stated grunting at my weight as she pulled me through an opening in the trees.

I grounded myself where we were.

"What' s wrong?" Nashaly asked her eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

My eyes stung as I stared at the house, that house.. _my_ house. It was the same as it had been a hundred years back just dusty, inhabited. The windows still had the curtains, where Charlie used sit by to watch television. Where he used to eat dinner at.. Where he was alive.

I bit my lip out of habit and started walking forward automatically.

"Stingher, my car's that way" Nashaly said tugging at my coat's sleeve, trying to get me to move the right way.

"One minute" I muttered stepping forward and forward until I was in front of the door I entered and exited through so many times as a human. I reached for the door and turned the handle to find it locked.

"Stingher, you can't go in there, we shouldn't even be on this property, it's been abandoned for years" Nashaly warned tugging on my arm more urgently.

I ignored her and picked up the dust coated mat up and found the key that I put under there so many times before. I put the rusty in the key hole and turned, a satisfied creak signaled the opening of the old door.

"Stingher, no!" Nashaly hissed but I ignored her again and walked in, inhaling the musky scent of my old life. "we could get arrested for this!".

I walked forward. The couch was there with a thin sheet over it, dust un top of dust, the same with the recliner in the corner. The television was gone. I walked forward, standing near enough to see into the old kitchen, a mess like Charlie would always leave it. Dishes were still there, untouched, unusable. The chairs were turned upside down un top of the dinning table.

A lump formed in my throat. I was a nascence to Charlie, a selfish human that only cared about myself.

"Stingher, what are you doing?" Nashaly grumbled standing behind me with her arms crossed.

"Go home" I mumbled not really into it. I turned around walking around her and up the stairs.

"I'm not leaving you alone!" Nashaly said stubbornly as she skipped up the stairs after me.

I stopped in front of my old room, hesitating. Would I be able to face everything that lies inside this room?

"Stingher, come on, you are weirding me out"

I let my fingers trace the wooden pattern on my door, the pealing paint coming off and floating to the dusty ground. It was all the same but so different…

I let my hand fall and turned, heading back down stairs.

Not ready.

**Read and Review. Any thoughts or comments for future chapters will be greatly appreciated!**


	11. Accidents happen

**Hello! Trying to make up for missed time here.. Yep. So I'm hearing a bunch of you saying you want Eddie to see Bell, well the end will tell you how close you are to reading it! I so love all of you, thanx for staying with me!!**

_I let my fingers trace the wooden pattern on my door, the pealing paint coming off and floating to the dusty ground. It was all the same but so different…_

_I let my hand fall and turned, heading back down stairs._

_Not ready._

"What?" I asked blinking again as I tried to decipher what Kami was trying to tell me in all her excitement as I lounged back on my computer chair that was located in my semi-large room. I had just gotten 'home' from my tiring day a few hours ago, almost about to get ready for the dreaded school when Kami came all jumps and giggles blabbering about something way to fast. "Slow down there, Flash Jr.".

Kami took a deep breath but her body was still jumping up and down, smile still gracing her small features. "Suns gonna be out today, no school, thunder, lightning, BASEBALL!" she squealed waving her hands up everywhere before letting out a random squeal and running out calling for Victor.

I huffed. Just my luck I suppose, too chicken to face Eddie at school so whoever is up there watching wants us to play it out. Ugh. I hit my head against the mahogany desk beside me, grumbling when I heard it crack a bit. Worst week ever…

I had no choice. I was the Maxwell's only pitcher and a good runner at that, and they would know something was up if I declined playing baseball since it was something I never allowed myself to miss out on.

"Jump for joy" I mumbled lowly as I picked myself up and made my way to the bathroom down the hall bumping into Alexander on the way.

"Watch it, Pumpkin Head" he snapped glaring at me before going away into his own room.

I turned my head to the side, biting my lip and mentally contemplating whether or not to see why he was upset with me this time. Did I spend too much with humans?

"Why me?" I sighed looking up at the ceiling as I opened the bathroom door and locked it behind me even though a locked door wouldn't do anything against a vampire. I looked at myself in the mirror for a second before shaking my head and undressing.

The warm water helped a bit, but it reminded me too much of the warmth I used to carry with me..

"Hurry up, Blesser!" Ceciel yelled, a banging on the door shifting my attention away from my thoughts. Just my luck, get into a relaxing shower and getting kicked out not even a minute later.

"Hold your horny horses!" I stated back, not even bothering yelling when I knew it wasn't a bother with our high hearing. I really quick put shampoo in my hair, scrubbing it lightly in before rinsing it off and jumping out of the shower, missing the warmth. "I'll meet with you guys later, pitchers are always late!".

"Soar loser!" Alexander screamed but before a second passed the front door was slammed shut, the Maxwell household empty.

"Immature" I sang out grabbing a fluffy towel and drying myself off quickly, going from my unruly tangled hair to my small feet. Ugh, I still smell weird. I made my way back to my room, throwing on a random shirt and pants, grabbing the old baseball hat that Eddie had given me when I was a human, I might as well show him that I had proof that I had a connection with myself, physical evidence is good enough for me.

The hat was dirty, an antique by now, with the large 'C' proudly stamped on it still intact. It still fit my head, thank goodness.

I grabbed some socks and yanked them on my feet, then on with the worn out soccer shoes I had stolen from Kami a few years back- they all throw out good stuff away over new stuff, so I offer to take all the stuff they don't need.

I didn't mind.

I put my cell phone in my pocket as I headed out my door and to the living room, switching off all the lights before exiting. It was a dark morning, Kami was right like always, it was going to be a hard storm passing through.

The air was more moist then it was when I had first left the Lockheart's house, the dew on the grass thicker, the ground more swampier. It didn't smell pleasing, but it did fine by distinguishing scents easily. I smelt Victor and Kami, they didn't like riding in vehicles, they walked to the clearing we picked out for baseball, sadly the same field the Cullens used to play at also. I smelt the mixture of the rest of the family along with the fumes of the gas from the family car.

I followed the trial on auto control, my mind in the clouds, preoccupied.

"_now you can live out without either to go to" _

That's what that sick man had sad to me. Maybe he was right. I didn't have hell to go to because of the fear of loosing my humanity that I still clung to, I didn't have a heaven to go to, Edward was my heaven and he treated me like I was hell on feet.

I could drop my disguise, reveal everything I had been hiding for the past hundred years. But what then? Kiss and make up? What about Stingher? Would he be left alone as a past memory when he disserved so much more?

I grumbled as I shook my head. I had begun to think to highly of this face I was hiding behind of, I guess he just took up not only a personality but an actual person himself.

'_Who let the dogs out? Who, Who, Who, Who?'_ My phone started ringing and buzzing making me stop and pull it out, pressing it to my ear and switching my voice.

"Heya, Jake, what can I do for yeah?" I sang cheerfully leaning back on my heels to preoccupy my time.

".. Bella.. I have bad news" Jakes voice was strained, held back as if he didn't want anything unnecessary to pass through him.

"What is it?" I asked getting concerned and my body immediately became forming into my regular form. I knew I had to be with him if he was upset, I had to help him through something when I wasn't there all the other times he was going through a rough time.

I adjusted my hat, letting it rest lighter on my head as my head shrunk a bit. The clothes were more than a bit baggy, but I would deal.

"Bells.. Your grave was dug up" Jake sighed through I heard something shatter in the background.

My nostrils flared. Why in the names of all things moving would someone be so disrespectful and dig up a grave, why was someone digging up _my_ grave of all graves. It couldn't be a coincidence.

My thoughts immediately went to the Cullens.

They would have a reason to do this, to find out if what Stingher said was true. How could they?

My throat closed a bit.

Have they gotten insane? Couldn't they just leave me alone?

"Sam, Seth and me are in the cemetery right now, checking it out.. But something's off" Jake quickly explained, his voice still suppressed as he let out a sigh.

"Let me guess, Cullens?" I snapped losing my temper quickly, my vision going red with rage.

"No.."

My brain snapped. If it wasn't the Cullens than who would pick my grave out of millions of others?

"Three of them.. From what I gathered they weren't in a hurry, took there time but we didn't catch them in time" Jake informed me, "there has been some strange animal attacks back at the reservation, smells of vampires just when you left last night… I think they followed you Bella".

"No.. impossible" I muttered my worry heightening. If they followed me then they knew about my ability. "I knew my surroundings".

"Then they were trying to ambush you if you came back.." Jake sighed, "I knew it, I knew it, I told Sam over and over, it was an ambush, they staid at the reservation way too long".

Nausea swept through my mind, not human sick or anything like that, but something like a lightheadedness, disbelief too strong.

I sat on the wet ground and sighed. This is so bad.. Who would be trying to get to me? They had a chance way before. I had walked out of La Push, I smelt nothing, heard nothing.

'_..there has been some strange animal attacks..'_

"Animal attacks?" I asked.

"That's what the officials are covering it up as, we know better" Jake sighed again, like he was as stressed as I was, "bare tracks that they found too, throwing every human off, barefoot, human".

My eyebrows furrowed as it rang a bell. It felt like I knew something like this had happened before, but my human memories were too fuzzy.

"Bella" Jake said snapping my attention back to reality, "that's the same thing that happened when you were still human".

The same..

Barefoot.

Cover up..

Oh god.. Victoria, James and Laurent.

"I'll be over quickly" I said snapping the phone shut then opening it up again and dialing Damien's number.

It rang three times before he answered.

"Waiting for you, Blesser" Damien stated.

"I'm out for today, better stuff came up, say sorry for me" I said quickly as I hung up and shut the phone off so no one could call back with questions.

Little did I know I had forgotten to change my voice..

**EDWARD's POV**

This was utterly ridiculous, I had come here to release my anger on that stupid ball and I only got even more frustrated when I saw his family. I glanced accusingly at Alice, of course she would set me up like this. Couldn't they all just leave me alone? I blew up once, I understand their tension with me.

It was Stingher's fault, he played us all the way through since he first saw us.

My fists shook. He messed with our heads, played with our emotions till he was close enough to guilt us.

_Weird but I suppose it would only make sense since there is only one good clearing…_

I looked up to the one thinking and came in contact with golden eyes like my own belonging to a good heighted girl wearing shoulder length glossy light brown hair. Her head tilted in confusion when she noticed me staring and I quickly averted my eyes.

_Cullens, smullens, who cares. We can beat their asses anytime, anywhere.._

The boy- no man next to her thought, his gold eyes staring down at her territorial

_Beat him up too if he keeps staring at my girl.._

His eyes flashed to me threatingly before he went back to staring down at the girl.

I glanced around at all of Stingher's family, and I got confused. I had only seen them at lunch, no one in my family or even me had any classes with them, only except for the exception of Victor and Stingher, but they were top, like any other vampire would have.

Forks High School was small, it made no sense to me at all.

_Maybe we should leave.._

My eyes went to the obvious leader of the coven.

"I apologize, it seems as if we have intruded" he stated, his dark brown hair looking odd in the morning light, like a blue. He wore the same color coat as the rest of his family, Yellow and black.

"No worries" Carlisle stated with a friendly smile, being the humble one of us all aside from Esme who stood loyally at his side, offering a smile as well the was heart warming. "would you mind if we joined the game? It seems you have brilliant players" his eyes went around the coven like mine had already had.

That's when my eyes did a quick scan over once more. I guess getting caught up with my thoughts and despise of Stingher that I didn't realize he was the only one absent, no smell or sight of him anywhere.

"Not at all, we were waiting on our pitcher anyway, best you'll ever find" he chuckled flashing us his pearly k-9s, "I'm Damien Maxwell by the way, pleasure to meet the famous doctor after hearing much about you" he stuck his hand out and Carlisle happily shook it.

"As well as mine, Damien, my name is Carlisle Cullen, this is my family" he greeted gesturing with his now free hand our family, "I'm sure your children have told you all about them from school".

"Yes" Damien acknowledged.

_He better not.._

"But my children don't seem to be in any of your children's classes, I would like to introduce them to you" Damien continued.

_True, we haven't a good clue what their names are.._ Jasper thought calming the atmosphere around us automatically as awkwardness rose.

"Ceciel and this is Alexander" the girl, Ceciel, stated jumping forward and grinning, tugging Alexander with her who scowled at us, his attitude no better than his thoughts. "don't mind Alex, he's a grouchy old man".

Alexander scowled even larger.

"Pleasure, my name is Victor, this is my wife Kamilia" Victor stated with a welcoming smile as his hand rested lightly on Ka-

"Kami, please" Kami corrected, sticking her tongue out at Victor who only smiled in amusement. It hurt, seeing how much affection they had for each other.. Bella..

_Keep it together, Edward, they seem to not know about last night's outburst.._

My attention focused on that fact. That was true, they acted like they knew nothing about what I had done to Stingher, no thoughts of their's indicated that they even the slightest clue. Stingher was the one who seemed like a bragger.. Until..

_As I crushed him into the wall that dented with the force I implied his eyes stared at me in shock, but they weren't focused, they were zoned._

_I snarled and pushed him further into the wall. How dare he know something about my Bella and keep it from me! That bastard better start talking or I'll rip his head off and burn him chunk by chunk, first with his fucking mouth._

_New scents entered my nose and my family moved back towards me, still shocked by my actions but more caring about protecting one another as footsteps were heard behind me._

_I blocked everyone's mind out of my own and focused on Blesser._

"_Let Stingher go" the oldest one of the two demanded, his voice hard and demanding._

_Not a chance._

"_Edward, let him go" Carlisle warned me, voice tight with alarm, "Edward"._

_No._

"_Edward" Jasper warned, his voice next to me, trying to change my mood but I butted him out. This was between me and the freak._

"_Let him go, now!" the voice repeated this time much louder with volume making Stingher's weird glint in his eyes come back, his focus back on reality. Good._

_I snarled again, this time much deeper, vision stained with red._

_Then more yelling from the unfamiliar vampire, but Stingher's eyes still wouldn't leave mine, something not right in his eyes, it wasn't hate or shock, but fear, vulnerable fear that I couldn't force myself to use as my advantage. Something didn't feel right through his unthinking mind.._

_My family kept yelling at me, but I didn't budge, not when I was so close to my Bella.._

_I said something I didn't even think through, I was too zoned, both trying to make Stingher fess up on what he knew and trying to decipher that look in his eyes._

_Then he grinned. Freaking grinned. My lips rose over my teeth, anger deepening._

_He started saying something, using my old human name, making me freeze, besides my family no one else knew that.. _

"_I heard from your sister that your saying that Bells' left you, 'cause I'm such a gay bastard I want you to go in a closet and lose your virginity 'cause you got to face reality, bucko, you left her but I guess in the end you're right she sure the hell made a new life for herself without your help, funny, thinking that the first time I met her she said she couldn't live without her precious Eddie, and now I think I've seen the fucking light also._

"_What's so special about a man that left someone defenseless to fend for themselves when you, the man, had promised her that you would never leave her? Sure I understand the whole Jasper situation but that could have been sorted out, look at him now, no blood thirsty monster there, no sirrey. If only you stayed with her and fulfilled her one wish to be with you for eternity, think of how it would be right here, right now. I wouldn't be in your Mr. Shitting face with my rambling. Further more maybe I wouldn't have existed knowing how wrong a man could go with just one decision. So cut your crap about me needing to be straightened up and matured, I've faced reality and it's waiting for you to face it along with your guilt"._

_Stingher Blesser wasn't full of pretty rainbows and daisies._

How much did Stingher really hide from his own family? They seemed to be all thinking the same of him.

_Smiling boy better hurry his ass up_

_He probably is getting distracted by a male model.._

_Mr. Guy better hurry up.._

_He never misses a chance to play ball, must be staring at his reflection again, poor dear…_

Not an ounce of knowledge of how deep Stingher was, is.

'-_and shove them in my face, it's like I'm the one you love to hate, but not today, so shut up, shut up, don't wanna hear it.._' Damien's phone went off and a sheepish smile crossed his face as he apologized for the interruption and flipped it open.

"Waiting for you, Blesser" Damien stated, rolling his eyes. My ears perked up to listen.

"I'm out for today, better stuff came up, say sorry for me" it wasn't Blesser, but that heavenly voice that hadn't changed even when turned.. Light, sweet, heavenly.. Beautiful..

"Bella" I choked out.

_**Read and Review. Any thoughts or suggestions for future chapters will be greatly appreciated!**_


	12. Long awaited reunion

**Yes. Hate me if you will but I nearly got straight eyes this Quater since I've been kicking my but to study, I proud of myself. This is your present now :) please forgive the geeky writer who has kept you waiting for what seems like years... I have read every single review, I know you guys HATE cliffies. I tried not to make this one a cliffy... see how you like it! HAPPY HALLOWEEN, even if you don't celebrate it. Love everyone!**

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"_I'm out for today, better stuff came up, say sorry for me" it wasn't Blesser, but that heavenly voice that hadn't changed even when turned.. Light, sweet, heavenly.. Beautiful.._

"_Bella" I choked out._

"Edward, No!" Alice screamed out shrilly but I was already gone, running towards the faint trail that the Maxwell's had left behind, my mind set on that voice that has been haunting me for years on end without stop.

She was so close, she was alive.

**ALICE'S POV (Finally, I've been plotting this forever)**

"Bella" Edward choked, his eyes going wide and his stance going tense his feet already in the position.

Suddenly the world when blank and scenes flashed before me.

_Standing alone on the corner of a closed cafe, in front of the cemetery was a vampire, Bella. She had darkened golden eyes, close to black, indicating that she hadn't eaten in a while. She looked different, her hair was cut so short, not shorter than mine but resembling Jasper's. She looked so hindered, like the world was on her shoulders._

_She ran her hand through her hair with a troubled face before it went black, her future went black._

_Another scene replaced that one. It was in a place surrounded in a bunch of trees, the trail leading to town, the Maxwell family along with my family was in a stance ready to fight against.. Victoria and a whole army of newborns surrounding all of us, no way to escape. Victoria was smiling though she looked off, like she had been doing something before being sidetracked. They were all closing in on us, Carlisle's reasoning not working, Edward furious, Jasper holding his head, I was frustrated. Then it went black._

_All of our futures ended._

My eyes snapped in focus and Edward was already leading himself into all of our fates.

"Edward, No!"

**BELLA/STINGHER'S POV**

I couldn't believe it, how could they be back after what Edward did to James? Yes, they would want to get back at the Cullen's but why go did up my grave when their's nothing-

CrapCrapCrap..

Of course they would try to get back at Edward by using me, messing with my grave but they found nothing there, now what would they be thinking?

I closed my eyes and tried to think, If I were a nomad with the mind set on revenge only to find that plan A didn't work what would I do? I would find out another way to get back at the bastards, like Stingher was doing with the Cullen's but out to kill not torment. What would plan B be?

Go straight for the gold. AKA- kill Edward Cullen directly.

I stopped just short of the cemetery, able to see the iron gates but didn't go any further. If I exposed myself to them right now, then they would go after me which is a big no, no, but I needed to speak with Jake- but the wolves have the same or better sense of smell than a vampire so I would be able to speak with them in my regular form.. I could finish talking to them without endangering myself than go save Edward's buttocks from getting killed no matter how tempting it seems.

I took a deep, unneeded breath and went through the gates, the scent of dog immediately entering my senses. "Jake?" I called out, running a hand through my hair to flatten it somewhat.

"I'm glad you're okay, Bells" Jakes voice came from the edge of one of the tall mantle pieces of grave and he came bounding around it, engulfing me in a tight hug, "Seth just sighted them heading southbound, the woods, we think that they're retreating".

South. Woods. The baseball clearing.

"I gotta go" I stated in a rush, hugging him back quickly before stepping back, "they're headed for the Cullen's".

His face darkened at the name but beside that didn't change, "we're not letting you go alone, there's three of them and by the looks of it two of them are newbie's- red eyes".

"I know, vampires that feed on humans always have red eyes" I reminded him taking out my cell ready to call and warm both families.

"No" Jake stated, "they're new, Bells, two killings were made up in La Push without the findings of bodies, they had _bright _eyes, we know the difference, only the female was aged".

I stared at him.

He stared back.

CrapCrapCrap…

"You mean the main one turned them just days ago? And now she's using them as her assistants?" I asked my mouth gaping open. This just gets better by the moment.

"yeah, males by the missing body reports" Jake stated with a sigh, "this doesn't look good for you or the vegetarians, please just stay out of this and let the pack deal with this".

"I owe them something" I stated poking his shoulder just as Seth walked forward, "anything new?"

"Hell yeah, nomads are heading right towards two covens of our friendlies" Seth stated with a sloppy grin, "I know we have to help them but what I would kill to see this stand off, the three will get their heads torn from them".

I got an uneasy feeling, like I did something I shouldn't have done. There was more than this, something bigger is about to happen. They were out for Edward, not any of the families.

Right?

"I have to go, I promise to be back as soon as possible" I said with a quick nod of my head, "don't follow" I warned them with a stern glare.

"Bella, don't" Jake begged stepping forward and gripping my forearm, not allowing me to leave, "I just have a bad feeling".

A dry laugh escaped my throat, "That's two of us".

"You aren't going anywhere, Bella" Jake stated.

"I'm not a human anymore, Jake, you have to remember that" I hissed desperately, feeling as if my time was running out, "come on, let me go, I'll be fine".

"I won't lose you" Jake said tightening his hand on me.

"Let her be, Jacob, I want in on the action too" Seth joined in.

"NO!" Both of us snapped making his lips turn up in a scowl, muttering something about parents.

"I'll just go back and continue watching leaves fall" Seth sighed, "_so fun_".

"I'm coming with you" Jake insisted.

"I can go alone" I said just as insistently.

"Please" Jake begged eyes going big and teary eyed.

I closed my eyes. I couldn't go as myself, it would hurt too much to see Edward. He would hook onto me and make me fall for him all over again. Jake doesn't know about Stingher, I can't go as him or he wouldn't trust me.

I raised my hands and ran it through my hair. What to do?

"_-I've never had much patience with Romeo"_

"_What's wrong with Romeo?"_

"_-Mistake after mistake. Could he have destroyed his own happiness any more thoroughly?"_

**NEW MOON PAGE 17 (one with the awesome new cover with Jake and Bella on it XD anyone get it yet?) ALL RIGHTS RESERVED TO STEPHENIE!**

I let out a sigh as some of my human memories came flooding back. I don't vaguely remember where this conversation took place but Romeo sounded too much like me at the moment. I was the one making all the mistakes here, not letting Jake help, torturing Edward, hurting everyone, lying to everyone, lying to myself. I've destroyed my own happiness to fill it with fake smiles.

"Fine" I sighed opening my eyes to see him smiling brightly.

"Good, now let's go" Jake snickered, finding something very amusing at the moment.

"Yes, please just ignore me" Seth grumbled, "not a whining child, no sirrey, just a grown boy being ignored his rights".

I ignored him and Jake and me were on our way, that troubling feeling still in the pit of my stomach.

The silence wasn't fit with Jake, he kept on glancing at me oddly while we were speed walking. It was awkward.. Very.

**EDDIE POV**

I wanted to rip her face apart, throw it into a raging fire, bring her worthless body back and do it all over again.

Her thoughts were in an area that mine were in when I ran into her, but they were.. Unjust.

She **ruined** Bella's grave. I didn't care that my Bella was already alive in a way of speaking but it.. What if she was dead?

I cringed.

"Poor, poor, Edward.." Victoria chuckled flashing her teeth at me, very amused, "too bad your precious human isn't here to see this".

"Leave her out of this!" I roared clenching my jaw and my stance started to get defensive.

"Too bad grave robbers already beat me to my job. I was planning on modeling her for you, how thoughtful of me, right?" she stated flipping her wild colored hair behind her shoulder. "of course it is, just a little gift for your mate - mate for mate, right?".

I was so tempted to just run up to her and shake her till the venom in her system rushed to her head. More than that. I stepped forward but was stopped when other thoughts hit me like a brick followed by other vampires stepping out of the tree lines, first two that were newborns than more of them came out.

_Edward stay where you are!_ Alice's thoughts stood out more than the rest, her thoughts thrown at me franticly. My eyes moved to the side, where I thought it came from, than more thoughts ran into me.

_I hope Edward's okay, I feel so bad.. _

_This all came back because of that human, right? Should've guessed.._

_Can't wait to fight, finally some action!_

_Where is gay, homo, anyway? He always seems to disappear at the oddest times._

_Stingher, you better not be doing what - forget it, might as well just wait for something to come randomly flying out at me… wonder if he tackled the Cullen yet.._

It was both my family and Stingher's family coming towards me. Alice must have seen this. Damn it why didn't I stop when she yelled to me? I could've avoided this without all this happening..

"Your petty family coming to save you?" Victoria snapped with a snort and then she came flying towards me and I couldn't react right away with all of my frustration pulling down at me-

She never got a chance to touch me.

A russet colored dog shot out of between two newborns who were caught off guard and managed to get Victoria's head in it's jaws just before she reached for me.

Now the newborns focused on me, no doubt that their orders were to kill me at any means necessary even if Victoria went down. They began to step forward, towards me, and I immediately took a defensive position, legs crouched and teeth bared.

They went in for the kill and though I might be outnumbered I lunged towards the nearest throat, letting my anger out. Many hands grabbed onto me and brought me down and I saw too many limbs, red eyes, jaws snapping until a slim, graceful, hand came through be force and grabbed the side of my torso and tugged me out of the crowd while pushing the attackers off of me. I kicked my limbs out, trying to help the stranger, pushing the newborns away and off of me. It was difficult, counting their strength and their unwillingness to give up, but I eventually was able to get out of there with my rescuerer's hands still gripping my torso. I looked up, intending to see Alice, or maybe even one of the Maxwell's, but I was met with coal black eyes that were placed on the most heavenly face imaginable….

"Bella" I chocked out getting up on my own two feet about to engulf her into a hug when the newborns started up again, now attacking both of us making my anger flare to life once again. I grabbed Bella's arm, loving the way the electricity still flowed between us, and pushed her behind me to protect her. There was no need since my family suddenly came hurling through the tree lines and lunged for the newborns, not a thought crossing their minds except to protect.

I moved forward intending to help them fight and protect Bella but her hand gripped arm and pushed me away from the fight, her strength out weighing mine and she managed to push me passed everything out of anyone's line of vision and she kept running, her hold on my arm true.

I tugged and tugged against her, wanting answers that she wouldn't answer, and when I had enough of it I gripped my free hand around her waist and lifted her in the air to my chest where I held her there and hugged her, stroking her hair, memorizing her skin and smell.

"We have to move, Jake won't be able to hold Victoria back that much longer- Edward, I'm serious! We can talk later, right now we need to go" Bella stated pushing against my chest with a foreboding expression on her face, like she was about to cry. I tightened my hold around her. Nothing was going to hurt her ever again, I would never make that retched mistake again.

"I'm so sorry, Bella" I breathed out kissing her temple, biting back a scowl when I smelt the filthy Mutt on her. If he was the one hiding my Bella away from me all this time I would be sure to have a long chat with him, not sparing his feelings any longer.

**BELLA/STINGHER'S POV (excited yet?)**

I wanted to cry.

Just being in his arms made the hole in my chest rip open and sear with pain. I tried to push against him once more but his hold was solid.

"Victoria" I reminded him clenching my eyes closed to fight the change that was coming.

"I understand if you hate me for what I did to you" he whispered in a broken tone making all my human memories came flashing back, "but please, if you would just have me once more, I can prove to you that I'm a better person..".

I was here to fix all of this, right? I was making mistakes after mistakes. It is time to make up for it.

"I don't hate you" I mumbled bowing my head down in shame. I had been telling myself for a long time that I have hated him, using him with Blesser.. " I don't, you are forgiven, it was understandable- now please, we have to go".

His hold didn't falter and I looked up in annoyance.

He was staring down at me with a relieved yet pained expression, "it wasn't, I should have sta-"

"You had your reasons, we both make mistakes" I hurriedly stated, "now we need to move, Victoria's after your death, and I'm not in the mood to fight with anyone, let alone you." _All I want is to make amendments _was the thought I left unspoken.

His head lowered and his lips captured mine in a blissful touch.

_"Are you purposefully making Edward hate your guts?" _

"_What you're doing isn't smart"_

"_You will leave her, that's what always happens.."_

"_You are just plain nasty, Blesser"_

Why had I treated him like that? I was so caught up in the game..

"My Bella" Edward sighed against my lips making my limbs go Jell-O-E and sink against his body, giving into what I had pushed away for as long as I can remember.

"_Believe me, even if something as terrible as her finding out what I am comes along I will still be around for her"_

I had to get him to Vincent's house, probably the only place he'll be safe since no one knows where he lives and I can mix and match some scents around so they can't track him.

"Let's go" I gasped for unneeded breath and tugged him out of the forest.

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_**Read and Review, any thougths and/or comments for future chapters will be greatly appreciated!**_


	13. Cover up

**So sorry fopr the late review, love you all and have a happy new year! And for those of you who want to have a new years resolution, do me a favor - don't be apart of the group that can't stick with their's. Keep the resolution going! **

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Vincent opened the door just as I walked up his drive way with Edward in tow. He stepped aside, already knowing my intentions of being here. I pulled at Edward's hand harder, my face tightening with tension that seemed to gradually roll itself onto me.

Edward hesitated as we passed through the threshold of the Glimheart's house but I gave him a jerk forward and followed once again without objection. Amber and Andrew were standing by the staircase, ready for the jobs I had already formed in my head for them.

"What's going on, Bella?" Edward finally spoke up as I watched his eyes train on Andrew, probably reading his thoughts and I sighed as I pushed my shield towards all the Glimhearts so he would focus on what was being heard by everyone. His eyebrows went down in confusion and then frustration until he faced me, a question on the tip of his tongue that died down when he saw me.

"Focus" I stated throwing a glance at Andrew asking for confirmation that he knew what his family was doing.

"I personally welcome you to our house, Edward, I am glad we meet on better circumstances" Andrew stated with a warm smile, "I hope that Stingher has in his good mind to forgive you" at this he threw a glance at me before swiftly returning his gaze on Edward.

"Is he here?" Edward asked as something dawned on him, he turned to me, "you know him, he said that he knew you, kept contact with you.. Stingher Blesser".

How I was glad my shield allowed me the simplicity of blocking others' thoughts from a mind reader as curious as Edward.

"We'll get around to the lovely fellow later" I replied gently urging him towards Amber who smiled and stepped forward, "follow their instructions and I'll be back soon".

"No" Edward said in a strangled voice, his eyes searching mine with desperation, "I can't let you go, not after all that I left you with".

"This is for you" I stated backing up and glared at him when his footsteps echoed mine, "let me save you, Edward, I'm not a human that needs a protector".

His lips thinned out and was about to make a retort when his eyes shot behind me and his chest vibrated, I was about to turn to see what the problem was but my answer came to me when Vincent laid his hand on my shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly.

"No worries" Vincent stated sincerely, "we will sort it out.. You won't be absent for long". He winked and he knew the plan thoroughly.

I looked back at Edward and stepped into his arms, hugging him tightly, knowing that I wouldn't be able to feel the security of his body with Stingher present, "see? They will help me - they will protect you".

"I don't need protecting" Edward hissed in my ear, hugging me tighter.

"You got to protect me" I whispered, "now it is my turn" I nudged away from him but he wouldn't let go. I sighed and peaked under his arms at Andrew, closing my eyes and nodding to him.

I knew this would happen and I could only pray Edward could forgive me.

"NO!" Edward roared as Andrew's hands clutched his shoulders and flung him away from me, arms blindly swinging. His honey eyes molded into a pitch black tent as they stared into mine. I blinked and looked at the ground, momentarily ashamed before I sighed and looked back up. His hands were in fists and he struggled against Andrew and refused Amber's gentle touch. "Bella, don't go, I could never forgive myself if Victoria hurt you!"

"Ditto" I murmured turning on my heel and walked to the door, hearing his angry yells of protest, begging, pleading. I had to tune them out as I escorted myself out and to the side of the house where I leaned against the wall and focused on Stingher's form, male, funny, goofy, different.

My clothes began to tighten around my slightly growing form and I flexed my fingers out as the bones filled in and became rough, my jaw gave a thud of pain before it smoothed itself out. I held in a sigh of relief when everything did its own things and finished.

My eyes shot open and I let a grin grow on my face. "Missed you, Stingher" I murmured to myself while running a hand through my hair before listening to the noises going on in the house.

Nashaly's POV

I whistled and had to force my eyes away from the scene as Andrew led me away from the scene after I had come out of the library from upstairs.

Edward Cullen had a serious attitude that I had never known to live inside of him.

"What with Edward?" I asked lightly as I put a skip into our walk to the kitchen and grinned up at Andrew, a almost look a like to my boyfriend. His eyes flickered down to me with a warm tint to them.

"You know how Stingher gets to him about being gay" Andrew chuckled and suddenly diverted up from the kitchen and to the front door.

"Stingher's here?" I asked excitedly, my eyes shooting back and forth, craning my neck back to look behind us. Was he hiding? That little sucker…

"Why, of course, he loves your company" Andrew chuckled as he opened the front door and there stood Blesser in all his gay glory, hands shoved in his pockets and a grin plastered to his sickenly sweet baby face.

"Who loves who?" Stingher asked in his smooth, not quite deep voice, that I learned to listen for these days. He stepped forward into the house, shaking his head to get his hair out of his face before sloppily wrapping an arm around my shoulder and leading me to the kitchen, "missed you, Nash, what's been crackle-lackin'?"

I threw back my head and laughed, how I missed him, "Your boyfriend".

His lips twitched before they formed a pout, "What's with Eddie?"

I was about to answer before I noticed it again. I had noticed it at school and in my car when Blesser was there. I see it every where when in Drama class, those tiny mistakes when trying to act that give a person away. I narrowed my eyes slightly at him before cracking a smile, "apparently you said something".

He blinked, lost in thought for a moment before he shook his head with that fake grin still plastered on his face, "aw, yes, I remember. Said something about his Girl Friend".

"Girlfriend, you say?" I asked surprised, as far as I knew Edward has been single and probably would lean towards the gay side after time… guess not.

"Didn't see her?" Blesser asked rubbing his small chin, "must have left a while ago, just escorted her out".

I rolled my eyes, "what a kind gentleman of you".

"You think?" Blesser chuckled opening the fridge before shaking his head and turning to me, "want anything?".

"Actually could-" I started saying but broke off when I heard a crashing on the second floor, yelling, and something shattering. I turned on my heel about to yell for Vincent to see if he was alright when Blesser's cool hand appeared on my shoulder, his eyes weary as they stared at the staircase.

I mentally noted that fact - he wasn't acting with that emotion, and if he was weary I should be too.

"What's going on up there, Blesser?" I asked in concern, turning my attention back on the stairs, wanting someone to come down and explain what was happening.

"A man fight" Blesser guessed with a roll of his shoulders, "last time I checked I almost got female dog slapped by Eddie, no surprise that he's still a bit mad".

"A bit?" I snorted pulling some of my extra curly hair out of my face in annoyance.

"Wanna watch a movie?" Blesser asked playing with a strand of hair that decided it didn't want to be with the crowd today, he smoothed it back with the others and smiled when it stayed. I shook my head, only Blesser would want to watch a movie at a time like this.

"Lets go - but I pick" I told him poking him in the chest before walking into the living room and looked through all the movies the Glimheart's had.

I ended up picking a movie that I think Vincent was sick of seeing, so I was glad it was Blesser I was torturing this time.

Jumanji, it's probably old by now but I absolutely adore the comedy - if people want to call it that. Blesser on the other hand though…

"Man that actor is sexay, wanna put him in a pot of sugar and eat him up for desert!" he whistled on the edge of his seat, staring at the screen with plastic like eyes, completely entranced. I rolled my eyes but flinched when I heard another banging from up stairs - they still haven't resolved whatever problem there was with Edward and I was beginning to worry about Vincent.

Blesser has just ignored it, saying the guy had issues to begin with denying him of his gay rights. I ignored _him_.

"You sound like that old witch from Hansel and gratel" I stated with a short snort, glancing up at him with a smirk.

"I take offense, I am not a child molester" he retorted back but still laughed at the thought. I shook my head as the credits started rolling and got up to place the DVD back in it's case. I was putting it up in its spot in the piles and piles of DVD cases when suddenly Blesser was standing in front of me, form still, his head turned to the stair case.

"What's going on, Blesser?" I asked in a whisper, my throat tightening. It didn't take long before I got my answer.

There was a growl from the top of the stair case and what do you know - Edward comes slugging down in, eyes coal black and.. Vincent's clothes on? Vincent trailed behind him, his normally calm golden eyes now dark, not black, just too dark for my liking, they were trained on Edward, his lips down in a frown. Amber nor Andrew came down with them.

"Nice of you to finally join us, Cullen" Blesser chuckled lightly, his frame shaking and if I hadn't seen it myself, I would have thought Edward was about to pounce on him if he hadn't shot a glance at me and glared holes at Blesser, "now that we have the family in one household, how 'bout we play a game of 'guess who'? I'm sure you're dying to play, Eddie".

Edward scowled at him and stalked away to the kitchen, not coming out for the remainder of the time.

"He smells just like you, Vince" Blesser noted with a nod, his voice hinting to something more significant that made _me_ want to pounce on him, I hate being left out on secrets!

"He does, doesn't he?" Vincent chuckled moving Blesser out of the way and engulfed me into one of his perfect hugs, I quickly snuggled closer to him, hugging him close, the dread I didn't know I was holding leaving me knowing that he was in my line of vision, not upstairs with an emotionally whacked up boy.

I flickered my gaze to Blesser, who was staring off to the kitchen, a far off look to his eyes. His body was still tense. Looks like he didn't shake off his unease yet.

I followed his gaze and thought the same thing over to myself.

What _was_ going on with Edward?

**Blesser's POV**

I sent a greatly glance at Vincent, partially relieved that Edward did in fact smell exactly like him for the time being, all we had to do is hope that he doesn't start smelling like himself for a very long time, at least until we get Victoria far away. All that needed to be done was to override his trail with something stronger, more repulsive, something that wouldn't lead Victoria here.

I smiled grimly at the spur of the moment thought.

"Hey, Vinnie?" I asked innocently, pulling out my old phone, spinning it in my hands.

His eyes went weary but he let a smile grace his lips to keep up the façade with Nashaly around.

"The party is about to start, don't you want to start calling people to make sure their still coming?" I ask tilting my head to the side, whispering to him and only him, "Edward's trail still needs to be covered".

For once in my life, I sincerely wanted to crack up laughing at the reaction I got from him - his eyebrow twitched.

"I love you, man" I cackled flicking my phone open and started roaming in search of a phone book to find all the numbers of the teens in Forks High.

* * *

**_Read and Review. Any thoughts or comments for future chapters will be greatly appreciated!_**


	14. NOTICE

**SPUR OF THE MOMENT ANNOUNCEMENT!**

**I NEED SOME CHARARCTERS FOR THE PARTY IN CHAPTER 14, ANY OF MY READERS ARE MORE THAN WELCOME TO PUT THEIR OWN NAMES AND DESCRIPTIONS!**

**PLEASE, I NEED MY READER'S HELP.**

**MAKE UP CHARACTERS, OR BRING CHARACTERS FROM YOUR OWN STORIES INTO MINE! I JUST NEED A COPYRIGHT SO PEOPLE DON'T THINK I'M STEALING YOUR CHARACTERS! **

**LOVE YOU ALL, THANK YOOOOOOU! :)**

So far I have some characters (and I thank all the beautiful readers out there, I'm so happy! Yes, I am human, and I love getting help!)… by the way, not to say anything.. But are most of my reviewers… _girls_? Come on boys, you need a come back! And girls no worries, I am a chick myself.

Avari - Description, going to guess on your height and say your average, 5'4''? You are naturally tan, but not the dark shade, thanks to Forks. You have those all seeing eyes that could spot sugar a mile away (you said you were hyper, so your purpose in the next chapter should be known now, though I did take in account the you do tend to be a loner) with your expressive amber eyes. I'm dressing you in the latest Hot Topic rainbow colored décor, since you said you were a tomboy I didn't want to stick you into an outfit coming out of Claire's. (by the way love your enthusiasm!) All rights go to Avari-at-heart

Haley - 5'6'', slender and a healthy kind of pale, not deathly skinny but just right. (I am putting you on Forks' indoor basketball team, or something sportsy, you fit with the guys, taking notice you say you are a tomboy at heart). Shiny mahogany brown hair that curls, added blue and white highlights (totally wicked, wish my family would let me do that). Wide brown, almost black eyes, that can see the slightest of movement. (hrm, kinda tipsy to where I should place you in the chapter, would you mind if I had you mess with Eddie? Maybe possibly Stingher?) All rights go to BELLA-Brown-EYED-Spy

Krisann - 5'2'' (Short for me.. Right?) Your hair is a mix between curly and straight, giving you a wild look (when adding your gothed out emo look I'll be able to make a good scene, if that's okay with you) Eyes that change color with the lighting outside (once again, I'm envious of my readers). Your clothes come with the tight black jacket, spiked belt, and black and white checkered skinny jeans. All rights go tobrokenfromthepast

Dom - erm, you didn't make this easy on me, I looked on your profile, I swear. Don't kill me. You are 5'4'' with pale skin. You tend to be the book nerd, you don't like to run around much since you get injured too much, and you take learning seriously since you want to become a doctor (you will float more towards Eddie in this case, your curiosity getting the better of you). You will fit into the formal attire, polo pale green shirt and navy blue skinny jeans. I'm gonna take a random pick and putting your hair color as black (I'm not that familiar with Filipino's, sorry!) that is straight and goes to your shoulders, and brown eyes that shine. All rights go toBonham Carter

Megan - 5'9'' (did I over exaggerate? You say your quite tall, I am a bit tall so I estimated). You have pale skin that compliments your silky brown hair that matches your brown eyes. Since you expressed your love for the arts I will put you as the DJ (if you would like to say) of the party, I'm gonna put that you carry around your CD's with you everywhere along with your ipod and CD player. Your attire includes a grey hoody with a red zipper and red skinny jeans (hope that's not too much..). All rights go tocrazyhypervampiregurl

Lilianna and Thomas - I can't justify what they look like, but I will put them in as the main couple at the party of humans (can't deny anyone, hun, and IM me when you get the story going, I would be honored if I could read it, seems great to me! *I felt stupid read the list that is on your homepage, the whole 2009 stuff, all of it is true…* Love the rest of the little things on there too). All rights to these characters belong to Hostage

Natalie - 5'9''? (once again quite tall means tall to me..) Layered brown hair that is straight, hazel eyes that dance with lighting. Flexible figure (saying you like dancing you will be the partier, dancing to the crazy music and started the party up). Your attire would be one of… paramore and harry potter t-shirts and black skinny jeans (can't put twilight in there, now can we, lmao). All rights go to EdwardAteJames'Cookie

Tammy - 6'2'' (now that is what I call tall, man, grow some more and you'll beat my father's height at 6'7''!) you have a slim body but with feminine muscle (hyperness doesn't just aid you energy wise - you can get some build from moving around a lot!) You sport reddish brown hair (hrm, kinda reminds me of a russet color) you have big, wide, velvet blue eyes. With your personality I think You'll be floating towards Stingher and popping up in random places. Your attire would include a football hoody and bleach stained blue skinny jeans - with a baseball hat to go with it all! (I love your enthusiasm too, I say lmao all the time, so I don't mind lol - I'm sure you'll be saying it a lot in chapter fourteen). All rights go to tamyyiia

Tim and Tom - (*cackles evilly* ah thank you, hun, I am going to have fun with these two sweethearts). Lets say they are 6'2'' an inch or two taller than Eddie. Dirty blond hair with blue eyes, and of course those pearly whites (I'm gonna have it where they visit La Push all the time to hit the waves, okay? They'll bring in the slight musky scent of dogs in just to make a scene). REALLY synchronized, if one says something expect the other to react right off the bat in a similar manner. Nickname maniacs, the one's who do the crazy stuff and start silly fights (mostly with each other, ending in a slap in the had by either one, but for sakes lets have a certain someone interfere). All rights to these phenomenal characters goes to Jazmin Torres

Nicole - (ironic, very much so, my mother's name..) 5'7''. With this chick we are really going to have a teen party going on, she's gonna be playing with the boys (thank you). Full chest with blond hair that reaches her buttay, a player and teaser. Yes you are so right, hun, every story needs one! All rights to this character goes to sahisdabest

Sami - (once again, can ironic events happen every day? Grey is a last name of a character my friend is using in her stories!). 4'8'' with long black hair and brown eyes that litteraly glow with mischief since she has one edged with blue and green (she's gonna be the prankster with her energy and funny voice reminders, read two chapters of your story by the way, good flow to it). Tan skinned, despite being in Forks, going to have her being a transfer student. All rights to this FF character belong to the one and only STEPHANIE (I wish your last name was Meyer, that would be bloody wicked!) musycluver2011

Katheryn - 5'6'', blue eyes and very long blond hair. She's one of the more sophisticated brains of the bunch, the one in charge of the 'punch' bowl, mixing everything. Let loose and musical, interacting with as many people as she can. All rights to this character belong to GottaLoveFanFiction

Bryan and Shanna - (*howls in laughter* two pairs of twins, this is awesome, I don't know about you guys but I love writing with you guys helping me!) both 5'5''. sporting brown hair, B. has a neat cut and S. has medium length hair. Both serious about safety and pure business, the one to make sure everything goes smoothly at the party (making sure the cops don't get caught up in it). These two belong to GottaLoveFanFiction

Parker - (anticipation drooling out of my finger tips) 6'0'' tall, has the all natural dark look, emo hair that has [awesome] green and neon blue highlights that has that shaggy look to it. Peircings galore, all over face (can any one picture Pein from Naruto? Awesome right?). He is generally clean though, polo's and skinny jeans. Loner with that hidden artistic feel to him, intimidating (can anyone see him having a staring contest with Eddie and winning? *cackles* I can..) Has a sketch pad with him. Some personalities are gonna clash! This brilliant character comes from the talented mind of DazzlingTopas1901 (IM this awesome person, peoplez, and ask him to give you the link to his FictionPress story with Parker in it, I'm reading it and I'm glued to it!).

Okay. If there is any confusion or corrections that need to be done, IM me on Fanfic or at LiveLifeLikeNeverBefore()(). If I forgot anyone please tell me!


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